


Buttercream Oneshots

by fangirl1005



Category: Youtubers
Genre: Brothers, Buttercream, Buttercream Gang, Cute, Fluff, Friendship, Maynards - Freeform, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-14 22:46:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 27,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11793069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirl1005/pseuds/fangirl1005
Summary: Oneshots about Jack, Conor, Joe, Josh, Caspar, Mikey and Oli. These are also posted on my Wattpad and Tumblr at 'buttercreamficsx'. I hope you enjoy and feel free to leave requests or message me :)





	1. Hostage (Jack)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack is held hostage at a meet up

Although there are many advantages to fame, there are many disadvantages too. You earn money, can travel and make lots of great friends all whilst doing a job you love. YouTube was the same. To many, it was the ideal job. They could do what they enjoyed and were paid to do it. However, along with that came the negatives. The hate, the negativity and the lack of private life. Despite these risks, no one expected their lack of privacy and protection to get taken too far.  
Jack, Conor, Joe, Caspar, Oli, Josh and Mikey were all at a meet up. They had been there for a few hours and everyone had enjoyed themselves. They got to meet hundreds of fans and it was a lovely day. Around 2pm, the meet up had finally finished. The area was empty as all the fans had left. The boys all went to get a drink, a snack or go to the bathroom. Jack was walking towards the toilets when he felt someone grab his shoulder.  
"Mikey, I've told you before not to creep up on me like-" but he never got to finish his sentence. A gloved hand was placed over his mouth before he could scream. Jack was restrained and dragged off in the opposite direction. He tried to fight back but there were three of them and they were all much larger. They took him into a small room, probably used as a storage cupboard and locked the door behind them. The hand was removed from Jacks mouth.  
"What do you want? Who are you?" He stuttered, feeling scared.  
"Now now, stop asking questions"  
"Is this a prank? Did josh do this to get back at me?"  
"Shush, unless you want me to hurt you" one of the men growled.  
"Now, Jack I believe? We know that you have plenty of money and that you are here with your friends. We don't want to hurt you, we just want some cash and we'll be on our way"  
"We don't have much, we share rent and-"  
"Stop stressing lad, you won't get hurt as long as your friends contribute. Now, John here has a gun and as long as you do as we say, you won't get shot. You're going to walk out there and lead us to your friends. You will then ask them for the money we want. All the while, you will have this gun to your head and if any of your friends try to stop us, you will die"  
Jacks breathing increased. He felt sweat dripping down his forehead, his hands clammy. He stumbled out the door and walked to where his friends were. He heard his friends gasp as he turned the corner.  
"Jack!" They all cried out, shocked to see their friend being held hostage.  
"Now lads, Jack is fine, as long as you do as he says"  
"Th-they want money. I told them w-we didn't h-have any b-but they didn't believe me. Please help" Jack whispered, tears pooling in his eyes.  
"Please don't hurt him" Conor shouted, running forwards towards his little brother, but Oli grabbed him and held him back, knowing it would only anger the men and make it worse for Jack.  
"Ah ah, stay back lad or I'll blow his brains out" one of the men replied.  
"Alright alright, we'll give you as much as we have, just leave Jack alone" Joe said, stepping forward with his hands held by his head in surrender. Joe didn't get a chance to hand anything over as he was interrupted by a swarm of policemen surrounding them.  
"You are surrounded. Release the boy and drop your weapon" one of the officers shouted.  
Realising their defeat, the three men lowered their weapon and knelt on the floor. The man let go of Jack and the young boys knees gave out beneath him, not strong enough to hold his weight. As he crumpled to the floor, Conor sprinted forwards and collapsed next to his little brother. He pulled Jack into his arms and held him tightly.  
"It's all right, I've got you. They can't hurt you any more, you're safe" he soothed, running his hands through jacks hair.  
"I-I'm s-sorry I led them to you. I just didn't know what-what to do" Jack sobbed, clutching onto Conor tighter.  
"Don't apologise for anything Jack, I shouldn't have let them catch you. I promise nothing will ever happen to you again"  
"Please take me home" Jack whimpered, nuzzling his face into his big brothers neck.  
"Of course, we'll go now"  
"Excuse me sir, but we need a statement from your brother" an officer interrupted.  
"No. He's coming home. You can speak to him another day, he needs to rest now"  
"I understand but-"  
"No. My brother won't answer your questions. Come on Jack" Conor said sternly. He pulled Jack up and wrapped his arm around his waist. Jack leant on Conor, the latter supporting most of his weight. The seven boys returned to Jack, Conor and Josh's flat and all sat in the living room. No one went home that night. Or the one after. Each boy wanted to keep an eye on the youngest. Jack was like a little brother to them too and didn't want to leave until they knew he was safe. Jack would recover from his ordeal due to his family and his friends who were there to support him through everything.


	2. It's In The Past (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack has nightmares about how he used to be abused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The topic of abuse may trigger some readers. If you are sensitive to the topic, then please be aware before reading this. There is no graphic detail but it could still cause distress x

No one can deny how close the Maynard brothers are. They lived together and did pretty much everything with each other. Jack and Conor were alike in so many ways and different in others. Both were funny and they always had their friends in fits of laughter. Most would assume that the brothers had a happy childhood due to how close they were and that was true in some sense, but they never told anyone about the secret of their younger years.  
Jack masked it well. You wouldn't be able to tell unless you were looking. You couldn't see how occasionally, when someone would raise a hand for a high five, he would flinch before returning the hand. No one thought anything of Jack always sleeping with a light on. And no one ever thought it strange when Conor would come out of Jacks room in the morning when they went to sleep in separate rooms the night before because they were brothers. That's what they do, right? And that's just how Jack wanted it. He didn't want people to know how much of a disappointment he was to his father and how he wasn't good enough. Conor had an amazing voice and Anna was the golden child. But what was Jack? The nuisance. The middle child. The mistake. And their father didn't hide that fact. No he told Jack constantly what a failure he was, and if the words weren't enough, then the bruises and broken bones certainly proved it. Conor tried his best to prevent it, to protect his little brother, but what could he do? He was only a child himself. The abuse carried on for years, until Jack was old enough to stand up for himself. Even then, he still got black eyes and an arm in a cast due to a 'football accident'. After his father had finished with him, Jack would run to Conor's room and Conor would clean his cuts and bandage what was necessary. Jack would cry and Conor would promise he would get him out of there one day. And he did. As soon as Conor was old enough, he bought a flat and took Jack with him. They had always lived together from that day as Jack hated being alone.  
Even though it happened years ago, Jack was still scared. Scared his father would return and hurt him again. Scared of loud noises and fights. Scared when a stranger got too close. But, as the years went on, Jack became better at hiding it with Conor's help. The only time the guard would slip was at night. He still got nightmares. He would wake up screaming and Conor would stay with him. That was the routine and it was ok.  
It happened again. Jack gasped, bolting upright. He looked around, panicking. He was drenched with sweat and was near a panic attack. Luckily Conor heard and he came running in.  
"Hey hey Jack, it's fine, I'm here" he said softly, walking towards his little brother.  
"He-he did it again. He's back Con" Jack stuttered.  
"No he's not, it was just a nightmare. You're in your room and I'm here. He can't hurt you anymore"  
"I'm sorry" Jack whispered.  
"Don't be, it's not your fault" Conor replied, sitting besides Jack and holding his arms out. Jack fell into his older brother and clutched on tight while he sobbed. Conor just held Jack, knowing he needed to get it out. After he calmed down a bit, he mumbled into Conor's chest.  
"I'm sorry I woke you up. It's so childish, I should be over it by now"  
"Don't talk like that Jack, I don't mind. I'm glad I can help you, it's the least I can do. And why should you get over it? It's natural to remember. But don't forget that I will NEVER let anyone hurt you ever again, ok?"  
"Thank you, you protected me the best you could when we were little so I know you'll do it again"  
"I will. I promise. It's in the past Jack, it's just a memory" Conor said softly as he ran his fingers through Jacks soft hair. He was going to help his little brother and damn anyone who gets in his way.


	3. Friends For A Reason (Joe)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joe starts to believe his friends are only friends with him because of Zoe.

Joe loved his sister. They had always got along really well and were very close. However, her success in YouTube had left Joe with many insecurities. Zoe was famous and everyone wanted to be like her and be friends with her. This led him to believe that maybe his own friends, were only friends with him because of her. They wanted the chance to befriend Zoe and what better way than through her little brother. He didn't really believe it, well not until people kept referring to him as Zoe's brother. He was in a café when he heard some young girls talking about him.  
"Look!" One whispered.  
"What? What?" The other replied.  
"That's Zoella's brother!"  
"Omg it is!"  
People kept referring to him as Zoe's brother. So he started believing it. He started distancing himself from his friends, not wanting to get hurt. If they didn't really want him as a friend, then he wasn't going to make it difficult for them.  
Later that day, he got a call from Caspar.  
"Hey Joe?"  
"Hey Casp"  
"You alright?"  
"Yeah yeah, you?"  
"Yeah I'm good. Hey, listen, the boys are going out tonight and wondered if you wanted to come?"  
"I bet you wish Zoe was there too don't you?"  
"What? Joe? What you talking about?"  
"Nothing. I'm sorry, I'm busy. Maybe another time?"  
"Urm, ok sure?"  
"Ok bye"  
"See ya" Caspar mumbled as he hung up. What was going on with Joe? What was that stuff about Zoe? Then it clicked. Caspar suddenly understood. He grabbed his phone and rang a few friends.  
Joe walked into the restaurant, looking around for his 'friends'. He spotted them when Oli waved his hand. He walked over and sat down.  
"So, what's all this about?" Joe asked, breaking the silence.  
"We just wanted to let you know that you're our friend and nothing will ever change that" Caspar answered.  
"Right but you're friends with me for a reason" Joe snapped back.  
"Yeah, because we love you man. You're a laugh and one of our best mates" Jack chimed in.  
"We don't want to be friends with you because of Zoe" Conor added.  
"Mate if I wanted to be friends with Zoe then I would just speak to her. I wouldn't be friends with you just to get to her" Oli said.  
"Zoe's lovely and all and I'm glad she's my friend, but she's not the reason we're friends Joe. We're friends because you're funny and kind and you're my best friend. I love being around you and hey, if I didn't like you then I wouldn't have lived with you, would I?" Caspar spoke, wrapping his arm around Joes shoulder.  
"I guess... it was stupid wasn't it"  
"Nah, you just got the wrong idea"  
"Sorry lads, I'm glad you're all my mates" Joe said, smiling for the first time in a while.  
"And we're glad that you're ours" Josh said.  
"Now that's all sorted, let's order pizza!" Caspar shouted, making everyone around him chuckle.


	4. A New Maynard (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack finds out he has a daughter

Everyone knew that Jack didn't usual commit to one girl. He didn't tend to stick with one and settle down, instead he had lots of one night stands. Jack wasn't a bad person, he just never clicked with a girl. However, he didn't think this could lead to something that would change his life forever.  
Jack and Conor were home alone when Jacks phone went off. It was an unknown number.  
"Hello?"  
"Jack? Is that you?"  
"Yes, who's this?"  
"It's Amy"  
"Amy?"  
"We met at a club about a year ago. We spent the night together"  
"Wait, Amy, the one from Kings Club?"  
"Yeah that's me"  
"Oh, hey. It's been a while"  
"Yeah, look this isn't easy, but I've got something to say"  
"Sure, go for it"  
"You have a daughter"  
"W-what?"  
"I have a baby. She's yours"  
"But-but how? I mean I-"  
"Look Jack, I'm not expecting you to do anything. I get that this is a shock to you, and you didn't want this. I just thought you should know"  
"Why didn't you tell me before?"  
"I only just found out. See when we were... together that night, me and my boyfriend had just broken up. I needed a rebound and quickly. A few days later, we sorted stuff out. I told him I'd slept with you but he got over it. I found out I was pregnant with Beth and I just assumed it was his. But after she was born, I found out she has blonde hair. And I don't have blonde hair and neither does my boyfriend. She has your eyes too and I decided to get a paternity test done. Then I found out. She's yours"  
"So-so I have a baby"  
"Yes. And don't worry, we don't need your help, unless you want to be a part of her life?"  
"I-I cant talk about this now, I'll call you back" Jack said as he quickly hung up the phone.  
Jack sat on the edge of the sofa, staring into space. He tried to comprehend what was happening, but it was such a big deal. Conor chose that moment to walk in.  
"Ey up bro, what pizza do you want?"  
Jack didn't hear him.  
"Jack? You ok?" Conor said, frowning as Jack ignored him once again. Conor walked over to Jack and knelt in front of him. He put his hand on Jacks knee and suddenly he flinched.  
"Huh? What?" Jack stuttered.  
"Jack? What's wrong? You blanked out there"  
"I-I have a baby" he mumbled.  
"You what? What do you mean you have a baby?" Conor asked nervously, letting out a nervous chuckle.  
"Amy, this girl I slept with, she was pregnant. And she had a daughter. My daughter"  
"Oh my god, Jack are you serious" Conor gasped, standing up with shock.  
"And now I don't know what to do"  
"I mean, do you want to be a part of the baby's life? If not, that's fine, no one will judge you"  
"I don't know, I don't know" Jack whimpered, tears pooling in his eyes.  
"Hey hey hey, come here" Conor whispered, opening his arms and pulling his little brother into a hug. Jack fell into his brothers arms and sobbed into his shoulder.  
"What-what d-do I do? I c-can't be a d-ad" Jack hiccuped.  
"Shh, shh, you gotta breathe Jack, don't panic"  
"But I don't know what to do!" Jack cried, clinging onto Conor harder.  
"I know, I know but I'm right here. I'll help you, yeah? Whatever you want to do, I'll support you. Now what you need to do now is calm down. Take deep breaths with me. In and out. In and out. Good boy. Now let's talk" Conor soothed.  
"I don't know what to do Con" Jack whispered after finally calming down.  
"Do you want to be a part of his or her life?"  
"Her. Her names Beth"  
"Ok, do you want to know Beth?"  
"Yes. She's my kid, but how? I don't know the first thing about parenting"  
"You'll work it out Jack, I promise. Now are you sure this is what you want to do? Because there's no turning back. You can't leave when it gets tough"  
"No. I want to do this. I have to do this"  
"Ok then. Call her back. Tell her you're ready to be a dad"  
"You'll stay with me?" Jack said hopefully.  
"Always. I'll be here the whole time. I'll be the best uncle she'll ever have" Conor grinned, hugging his brother.  
"I know you will Con, and I'll be the best dad ever, I promise"  
"I know you will bro, I'm so proud. We finally get a new Maynard in the family"  
And Jack knew right from that moment, that he was going to love this kid so much and she would love him back. Jack and his baby.


	5. Hidden Talent (Jack)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conor finds out Jack is a good singer

Conor was always the singer in the family. Although Anna had a good voice, Conor's was amazing. That's why he was famous and was successful in his career. From a young age, Conor was known as 'the boy who was going to be a star'. And he did. Now everyone knew that although the singing talent was passed through the siblings, Jack didn't possess it. In many videos he had proved that he just didn't have the talent. He had musicality, he was an amazing DJ, but not voice wise.  
That is why Conor was so surprised when he heard a voice singing as he walked into the flat. He knew Josh wasn't home and neither were any of his friends. The only person it could be was his little brother. And that didn't sound like him. This person was good, like really good. So Conor assumed Jack must have had a friend round. He crept into the flat, trying to be as quiet as possible so he didn't disturb the voice. It got louder as he walked towards Jacks room. What he saw as he entered shocked him. He stood at the door frame and watched as his little brother sang. Jack was just sat on his phone, probably texting someone, but he was singing at the same time. Conor coughed and watched Jack jump out of his skin.  
"Jesus! Con! What you trying to do? Give me a heat attack?!"  
"Sorry" Conor laughed as he walked in the room.  
"How-how long were you there?" Jack mumbled, his face turning red.  
"I heard mate"  
"Oh my god, how embarrassing" Jack groaned, pulling a pillow over his face.  
"Embarrassing? Jack, you're amazing! Like insanely good! Why didn't you tell me? And how did you keep it hidden for so long?" Conor blurted out.  
"I'm not that bad, but I don't want anyone to know. I always sing when no one is home and whenever we film I just sing badly"  
"But Jack! It's a waste of talent! You could make money on this!" Conor gushed, feeling excited.  
"No. No. That is precisely why I didn't want you to know. I don't want to be famous for singing Con, that's your job. I want to make music, not sing it. I'm good at Djing, and I love it"  
"I get that Jack, but this could help you. It would help you get noticed"  
"No thanks Con, that's not for me. That's you. You're the singer"  
"But that was before I knew you could sing!"  
"I get you're trying to help, but I just don't want to sing. Thank you though, for believing in me"  
"Of course Jack. Although I want one thing in return for my silence"  
"Anything" Jack said eagerly.  
"You sing backup on my new track"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 is uploaded and is chapter 23 so go check it out x


	6. Protected (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anna hates Jack so she blames him for everything. Jacks parents then begin to abuse him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again the subject of domestic abuse may be triggering to some readers. Please be aware when reading this chapter if you are sensitive to the topic. Also, I absolutely love Anna and mean no disrespect to her when writing this, it was just a request from a reader x

Anna hated Jack. It was just that simple. She loved Conor but he always paid attention to Jack, so she hated him. It wasn't fair that Conor spent more time with Jack than her and he always had done. She always tried to cause trouble but it never worked. Anna was 10 at this stage, Jack was 16 and Conor 18. Her eldest brother had moved out about 6 months ago, leaving her in the house with someone she despised. Unfortunately, Jack didn't know of Anna's feelings and assumed she like him just as much as their eldest sibling. This was the start of a rough time for the youngest brother.  
Anna started thinking that if her parents hated Jack as much as she did, then maybe they would get rid of him. And it worked. She started off with small things, like taking Jacks stuff and leaving them about the house. This annoyed their parents because they were always tripping over his things and when they told him to put his things away, he stood there confused, knowing that he didn't in fact leave it there. Anna grinned, knowing that her plan was working. She moved on to stealing things. Starting with small things like food from the fridge and people's chargers, but developed into money. One day, her dad left his wallet on the kitchen table and Anna removed £70 from the item. She ran to her room and hid it under her bed. She smirked and ran downstairs.  
"Daddy!"  
"Yes darling?"  
"Please may I have some money for an ice cream?" Anna said, knowing this would mean their father would have to go through his wallet.  
"Of course, let me go get some"  
A few seconds passed when suddenly she heard a loud shout.  
"JACK! GET DOWN HERE NOW!"  
"Why? What have I done now?"  
"JUST GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE THIS SECOND"  
Jack trudged down the stairs, grumbling to himself.  
"What?"  
"Don't use that attitude on me you little brat. You know for a fact why I've called you here. You stole £70! £70!"  
"What?! No I didn't! I would never!" Jack shouted back, shocked at the news.  
"Well who else would it have been? It wasn't me or your mother. And it certainly wasn't Anna. So that leaves you. I bet you were going to spend it on drugs or alcohol weren't you? You stupid little kid!"  
SLAP!  
A sound echoed through the house. Jack clutched his face, his cheek still stinging from the blow. He gasped as he registered what had happened.  
"Now, give me the money back or I promise you, that is nothing to what you will feel in a minute"  
"But I-I didn't take it! I promise!" Jack stuttered.  
Before he knew it, Jack was on the floor, clutching his stomach. His fathers fist had collided with his tummy and sent Jack to the floor.  
"Think again before you steal from me lad" His dad muttered darkly before storming off. Anna lurked in the corner, smirking to herself. Jack caught a glimpse and glared at her.  
"What did I EVER do to you Anna?" He spat.  
"You stole Conor"  
"No I didn't!"  
"Yes you did" she shouted, getting angry.  
"What have you become? You're 10 years old and you're jealous of your own brother? Conor loves you just as much as me! Why can't you see that? Now look what happened. This is what you wanted all along wasn't it? For me to get cut out of your life so you could get Conor to yourself"  
"Yep and it's working" Anna said as she walked off. Jack clutched his side and lifted himself up off the floor. What was he going to do?  
The same thing happened for months. Anna kept getting him into trouble and there was no use denying it. His parents believed his little sister, of course they did. So he just took it. Blow after blow. He couldn't do anything. He was underaged and still at school. He couldn't leave. He was stuck there. Luckily, he spent most of his time at Conor's but managed to hide his injuries. Conor started to suspect something but wanted to wait for Jack to tell him himself. Little did he know, that would be happening very soon.  
Anna lied again. She started crying and told her parents that Jack hit her. Their dad saw red. All of a sudden, he shoved Jack with so much force that he toppled over. Jack knocked his head on the corner of the table as he fell, a blinding pain flashing through his body. He could feel something trickling down his face and knew there was blood there.  
"Get the hell out of this house you piece of shit" His dad screamed.  
He managed to pull himself up and he stumbled out the door. Jack ran as fast as he could, knowing he needed to get away. He knew the way to Conor's like the back of his hand so although he wasn't concentrating, Jack managed to get there without much trouble. He reached the door to Conor's building and rang his buzzer.  
"Hello?"  
"Con"  
"Jack? Hey bro, what's up?"  
"Please let me in"  
"Jack? What's wrong?" Conor asked, feeling concerned now.  
"Please just let me in" Jack whispered as he saw black dots dancing across his vision.  
"I'll come down to you, hang on Jack"  
"Jack" Conor called as he saw his little brother leaning against the door downstairs.  
"Con" he mumbled, his eyes fluttering. Conor sprinted towards him and caught Jack just in time as his legs buckled beneath him. He slumped to the ground as Conor lowered him gently.  
"Jack? Jack!" Conor cried, tapping Jacks cheeks.  
"M'alright" Jack slurred, trying to open his eyes. Conor noted the blood dripping down his forehead and decided to just pick him up. He lifted Jack easily enough and carried him up to his flat. Once inside, Conor placed him on the sofa and ran to get his first aid box. Jack fell unconscious as Conor cleaned his head wound, concussion overtaking him.  
When Jack woke up, his head was killing him. He felt a dull pain flowing through his whole body and a sharp pain in his head. His eyes slowly opened, adjusting to the light. Once his vision cleared, he saw Conor sat beside him looking worried. His eyes lit up when he saw Jack stirring.  
"Jack! You're awake!"  
"Con? What-what happened?" He mumbled.  
"You don't remember?"  
Then it hit him. His dad. Anna. Conor.  
"What did they do to you Jack?" Conor said, his voice laced with concern and a hint of anger.  
"Nothing"  
"Jack" he said sternly.  
"Ok" Jack whispered as he told Conor the whole story.  
Conor had his fists balled up by the time Jack had finished talking. He wanted to punch a wall, or even better, a person. How could his parents be so ignorant and cruel? How could he not have noticed his little brother was hurting so much. Jack noticed the look in his brothers eyes.  
"It's not your fault Conor"  
"I should have noticed"  
"I didn't tell you. Don't blame yourself"  
"But I do. So you're staying here"  
"What?"  
"You're not going back there Jack. You're living with me"  
"But I'll be in the way and-"  
"No. You won't. You're not living in that house anymore Jack. It's not fair. So you can stay with me until everything's sorted out. Maybe forever. I don't want you going back to those people and I don't care if they're our parents. I can't tolerate an adult treating their child like that"  
"Thank you" Jack whispered, tears filling his eyes.  
Conor quickly pulled him into a hug and ran his fingers through Jacks hair as he sobbed.  
"You have nothing to thank me for. I'll protect you forever Jack, you know that"  
"I love you" Jack mumbled, his tears slowing down.  
"I love you too bro, you're safe now" Conor said softly, his words being true. Jack was safe with him. He wouldn't let anyone hurt him ever again.


	7. Don’t Listen To Them (Jack)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack has an eating disorder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains triggering scenes. If you have a history with eating disorders or are sensitive to the topic, please be cautious when reading or don’t read it at all. I mean no disrespect to anybody who has suffered through this and I hope I have done the issue justice and can bring some attention to the serious issue of mental health. If you are suffering, please talk to somebody. It doesn’t have to be a family member, it can be a friend, a teacher or somebody online. If you need to talk, please message me and I’ll help any way I can x

Jack had his insecurities. Everyone did. But he was never that bothered by them. He didn't think about them too often until recently. He knew he what he was getting himself into when he started YouTube. He knew there would be haters and people who didn't like him, but he wasn't quite prepared for the hate he would receive. Don't get it wrong, the positive comments completely outweighed the negatives, but they were so personal and more often that not, hurt.  
Jack ignored them. He always had. But he recently started reading them for a bit of a laugh to start off with. There were some really stupid people out there, he thought to himself. But then he read more.  
"He's gotten a bit chubby hasn't he?"  
"I think he's put on a bit of weight"  
"Look at the size of him next to the others"  
"He shouldn't be walking around without a top on. He doesn't have anything to show off about"  
Jack read further and further into the comments, reading more and more comments about his body and weight.  
"It's not true. Just ignore it" he mumbled to himself, willing himself to believe what he was saying.  
From that day on, Jack was a bit more careful about what he ate. He made his food pile a little smaller and cut out the snacks in between meals. But it still wasn't enough. So he went to the gym for longer. He woke up early every morning and went to the gym for a few hours to burn off more fat. It was working, but jack didn't see that. He just saw too much fat. So he cut out breakfast. He didn't really need it anyway. And soon enough, he 'forgot' to eat lunch as he kept telling himself. Whenever one of the boys asked him to go out for a meal, he would just claim he was busy or already eaten. Eventually he just stopped eating altogether, unless someone forced him. Sometimes he couldn't get out of it, so he would eat. Then, as soon as possible, he would force himself to throw up. He started to feel good again. He felt better, but it wasn't enough. So he carried on. He stopped seeing people, worried that they would think he was too fat and he spent his time working out. Although he lived with josh and Conor, the two rarely saw him anymore as he was always too 'busy'. Conor was worried sick about his little brother and had confided in the rest of the group. They all agreed to come round and see what was wrong with Jack.  
The doorbell rang and Josh answered the door.  
"Hey!" He said as he opened it to Joe and Caspar.  
"Hi" they replied, smiling at their friend.  
Mikey arrived next, Oli following soon after. The 6 friends sat in the living room, waiting for Jack to join them.  
"Does he know we're coming?" Joe asked.  
"I told him but I'm not sure if he was really listening" Josh admitted.  
"I miss him mate" Mikey added, everyone agreeing.  
"I'll go hurry him up" Josh said, standing up and walking towards Jacks room. Conor sighed sadly, rubbing his hands through his hair.  
"What's up Con?" Oli asked.  
"Jack. I can't get through to him. I don't understand what's wrong"  
"Don't worry. He's probably just going through a dodgy stage" Caspar added.  
Their conversation was interrupted when Jack came down. He gave a small smile as he sat down besides Conor. Everyone just stared, shocked at how different Jack looked. He had circles under his eyes and his smile didn't quite reach his eyes. His cheekbones were sharper than usual and his clothes seemed far too big.  
"So... you alright?" Caspar said, trying to break the silence.  
"Hmm yeah" Jack mumbled, nodding his head slightly.  
"Right, well lets order this food then shall we" Joe added, trying to change the subject.  
An hour later, everyone had eaten their fair share of pizza, apart from Jack. He was forced to eat one slice by Conor.  
"I'm not hungry, I ate at lunch"  
"I don't care. You're going to eat some Jack"  
"But-"  
"No buts. Eat" Conor said sternly.  
"He's right mate, one piece is fine" Mikey added.  
Jacks eyes watered as he lifted the slice to his mouth. He finished his piece then stood up.  
"I'm going to the bathroom" he said quickly before dashing off. Conor watched sadly as Jack ran off.  
"I need to stop him"  
"Go on Conor. Help him"  
"Tell him we understand and that he doesn't need to change ok" Oli added.  
Conor nodded and walked off to try and help his brother. Him and the boys knew Jack wasn't ok and knew Jack had an eating disorder now. He just needed to realise it himself.  
"Jack? Can you let me in?" Conor asked as he knocked on the bathroom door.  
"Hang on"  
"Jack. Let me in. Now"  
"One second"  
"I'll break the door down Jack"  
"No Conor! Wait a minute!"  
But it was too late. Conor had already bashed the door down and gasped when he saw Jack leaning over the toilet.  
"Buddy" Conor whispered sadly, his eyes filling with tears.  
"I'm sorry" Jack said as he forced his fingers down his throat. Jack gagged just as Conor rushed forwards and pulled his fingers out. He grabbed Jack from behind and pulled him down to the floor so Jacks back was rested against Conor's chest.  
"No! Let me go!" Jack shouted, wriggling about trying to get out of the restraint.  
"No Jack. You need help"  
"No I don't! I just need to lose weight and I'll be ok!"  
"Stop it Jack! You don't need to lose weight! Look at you! You're practically skin and bone. I can see every one of your ribs. You're wasting away Jack and I hate it. You were fine the way you were. You were never fat and you let people get to you"  
Jack just cried at his brothers words. All the pain and feelings coming out from the last few months. Conor held him, knowing he needed to get it out.  
"Shh shh, its fine. I've got you buddy. You don't need to deal with it by yourself anymore. We'll help you. All of us"  
"I'm a mess" Jack hiccuped.  
"No you're not, you just got confused"  
"I'm so sorry Conor"  
"Don't be Jack. We all get lost sometimes but I'm here now. And we'll fix you, we'll get you back to how you used to be"  
"What if I fall back?"  
"You won't. As long as you don't listen to them and only listen to me. You're perfect Jack, don't change for them or for anyone else. Just be you and that's enough"


	8. Quiet (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Conor get into a fight and Jack has a fear of loud noises

Jack had always been afraid of two things. Spiders and loud noises. While arachnophobia was very common, the other wasn't. No one had any idea where it came from. Jack hadn't had any particularly traumatic experiences involving loud noises, he just couldn't stand them. Conor always knew how to calm him down and make sure that he didn't work himself up. However, this time, Conor was the one to scare Jack.  
They were having a stupid argument but both were stressed and venting their anger at the other brother.  
"Stop stealing my bloody clothes Conor!"  
"Oh sorry I forgot that you steal my sound stuff for filming?"  
"That's not the same thing and you know it!" Jack said, waving his arms about.  
"Um yeah. It is. Sorry I borrowed one of your shirts. God forbid you actually share" Conor muttered back.  
"But I needed that! I'm meant to be wearing that tonight!"  
"Oh you know what Jack! If you want it, you can have it! I'm SICK of you banging on at me about the stupidest little things. If you don't like it, feel free to move out!" Conor shouted, slamming his hand down on the table. Jack leapt backwards and away from his hand.  
"Conor please stop" Jack whimpered, cowering away from Conor.  
All of Conor's anger melted away at the sight of his little brother shrinking away from his loud voice and the pure fear in his eyes.  
"Oh god, I'm so sorry Jack I forgot" Conor said, realising what he had done.  
"Please don't shout" he whispered, hands shaking.  
"No no, I've stopped. It's fine Jack, no ones shouting anymore" Conor soothed, walking slowly towards Jack.  
"It's too loud" Jack cried, tears slipping down his cheeks.  
"Listen Jack, its quiet now. See. It's just me and you and we're whispering" Conor said softly, reaching out towards Jack. Jack nodded, letting out a shaky breath. He slid down the wall, not trusting his legs to hold his weight. Conor sat besides him, wrapping his arm around his brothers side. Jack leant his head on Conor's shoulder, nuzzling his face into him.  
"I'm sorry" Conor whispered.  
"It's fine" Jack mumbled back.  
"I'll keep it quiet from now on, yeah?"  
"Yeah" Jack replied, leaving the flat in silence, apart from the soft breathing of the two Maynard brothers.


	9. Not A Child (Joe)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe and Alfie start treating Joe like a kid

Joe was searching for a new flat and needed somewhere to stay for a bit. Zoe, being the good sister she was, offered straight away, basically forcing him to stay with her. It was nice for both of the siblings to spend some time together and for Alfie too. Joe was used to zoe being protective and stuff, but not to this extent. Her and Alfie were treating him like he was a kid. Although he knew they meant well, it was starting to get on his nerves a bit. All he heard was,  
"Is your bed comfy enough?"  
"What do you want for dinner?"  
"Is here ok?"  
"We can do this if you want"  
"It's up to you, whatever you want"  
"Be careful with that"  
Zoe and Alfie weren't aware they were being patronising towards the youngest Sugg as they thought they were just being kind. It was worse from Alfie because he was in fact younger than Joe himself. So Joe decided to make a really big meal for all 3 of them to prove he could look after himself. He tried to cook a variety of foods so everyone could have what they wanted, but joe was trying to do too much at once. He knew he was being a bit stupid considering he wasn't that good a cook anyway, but he thought he could manage.  
Zoe and Alfie pulled up to the house, worried when they heard the fire alarm going off.  
"Joe!" Zoe gasped, sprinting out of he car. She opened the door and coughed at the amount of smoke coming out of the kitchen door. She waved her hand around trying to clear the smoke enough to breathe properly.  
"Joe? Joe!" She called out.  
"Zo" Joe wheezed out, coughing harshly. Zoe reached her hand out towards her little brother and yanked him out of the room. He hunched over, coughing harshly as Zoe rubbed his back. Eventually he calmed down, only to be faced with an angry looking sister.  
"What the HELL were you thinking?!"  
"I'm sorry I-"  
"Joe what would have happened if we didn't get here in time! You could have, you could have died" She trailed off, whispering the last part.  
"I just needed to prove I'm not a child" joe mumbled.  
"What?" Zoe asked confused.  
"You always treat me like a little kid and I'm not. I understand you're only doing it because you care, but I'm not a child anymore"  
"Oh Joe, I'm sorry we treated you like that. You'll always be my baby brother and I don't think I wanted to let you go. I'm sorry"  
"It's fine, I shouldn't have been so stupid"  
"No you shouldn't, but I understand"  
"Sorry Zoe"  
"Don't be. I love you broseph"  
"I love you too"


	10. You’re Not Okay (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack has been feeling low and cuts himself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another triggering subject is being addressed here. If you are sensitive to the topic of self harm, then please be aware that this may cause upset. I have never experienced it myself, but know many who have suffered through it, so I hope I do the situation justice. If you are suffering any mental health issues, please talk to somebody. It doesn’t have to be somebody you know, it could be a family member, a friend, a teacher, a mental health helpline or even me. If you need somebody to talk to, I am always here to help x

He didn't understand. He didn't know why. Why he was feeling like this. He just did. Jack hadn't felt this low in a long long time. He was just stressed in general. He hadn't been eating or sleeping and seemed to have no motivation anymore. His friends were always busy and he felt lonely. He had never harmed himself before and it was an accident in how he came across self harm himself.  
Jack was just washing up downstairs, having nothing else to do and was busy washing the dishes. He suddenly felt a sharp pain on his arm and lifted it up to reveal blood dripping down his wrists. A knife had caught him in the sink. Jack stared at his wrists, mesmerised. He knew it was wrong, yet it felt so right. So he did it again and on purpose this time. It hurt a little, but it was a good pain. He was in control. He could manage it himself. So jack fell victim to self harm, like many others do. He knew how wrong it was but he couldn't stop. He hid it well, only cutting when he knew no one was around. He hid he small blade in a box under his bed and removed it whenever he felt like he needed to. No one ever noticed how he started wearing lots of long sleeved t-shirts. So jack carried on and on and on, watching pieces of him fade away as time went on.  
It so happened that Conor finished work early one day, so he decided to go home and see if Jack wanted to go out for lunch or something as he hadn't seen as much of his little brother as usual recently. He entered their flat, closing the door behind him.  
"Jack?"  
No reply.  
"You home?"  
Conor was about to walk to his room when he heard a slight movement. He stopped, wondering if he was just hearing things. But then he heard it again, shuffling about. It was coming from the bathroom. He found it strange that Jack hadn't answered him when he called out earlier, so he walked to the bathroom. Conor stood outside for a moment, wondering it Jack simply hadn't heard him. But then he heard a sharp intake of breath. Conor was worried now. So he burst open the door, not prepared for what he saw.  
He gasped as he took in the sight before him. His baby brother was sat with his back against the bath and blood dripping down his arms. He held a small knife in his arms and looked up at Conor in sheer terror.  
"Conor! You're not meant to be here so early!" Jack said, shock covering his face. But his shock was nothing compared to that of his brothers.  
"Jack" Conor whispered, bringing his hand to his mouth.  
"I'm fine, just pretend you never saw it" Jack mumbled, scrabbling about.  
"No you're not fine" Conor said, finally coming to his senses. He rushed forwards and knelt besides Jack. He grabbed a towel and pressed it hard against his wrists. Jack flicked in slight pain, but Conor carried on anyway.  
"What happened?" He whispered.  
"I don't know" Jack replied. "I just, needed a way out"  
"This isn't the way Jack and you know it"  
"I know but I got so lost" Jack mumbled, a tear dripping down his cheek.  
"You could have come to me. I could have helped"  
"I didn't want to worry you or involve you in my mess. You don't need this". Jack replied sheepishly, ashamed of himself.  
"Hey, don't ever feel like that. I want to help you in any way I can. I will never, ever make you feel bad about yourself ok? Nothing you do could ever make me ashamed of you in any way"  
"Thank you" He whispered.  
"Now, well get you cleaned up then we're talking this out. I want to know every single detail about this and why you feel this way. I'm going to help you Jack so you never feel this way again"  
"I won't let you down Con, I'll get better" Jack promised.  
"I know you won't, you never could" Conor said softly, pulling Jack into a hug. Jack buried his head into his brothers shoulder and let out all his emotions he had bottled up. Jack was going to get better eventually, with the help of his brother. Jack realised he could tell Conor anything at all and he would sort it for him, no strings attached.


	11. Grief (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacks friend dies

It hit him hard. It was such a shock. He was so young. He shouldn't have been there. He shouldn't have died. Adam was the nicest lad you could have met and he didn't deserve to lose his life. Jack was crushed, but he didn't show it. He held it in until it became too much.  
Jack was with Conor when they got the call.  
"Hello?" Jack said.  
"Jack?" Someone whispered from the other end.  
"Yeah? Who's this?"  
"It's Josh"  
"Oh hey mate"  
"Jack..."  
"What's up man?" Jack asked, concerned.  
"It's Adam, he-he-"  
"He what?"  
"He's dead"  
Jack fell silent. He didn't feel the phone slip through his fingers and drop to the floor and he didn't notice Conor rush towards him and shout his name. Nor did he pay any attention when Conor pushed him towards the sofa to sit down. He only came back to reality when he heard Conor talking on the phone.  
"Who is this?" The elder brother asked.  
"It's Josh. Is this his brother?"  
"Yeah it is, what's wrong with Jack? What did you say?"  
"His mate. Our mate. He's died"  
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry"  
"It's awful. He was such a nice lad, didn't deserve it"  
"What happened?" Conor asked softly.  
"He got hit by a car, drunk driver"  
"I'm so sorry, I can't imagine how you're feeling"  
"Thank you. Please make sure Jacks ok"  
"I will, thanks mate" Conor said as he hung up the phone.  
"Jack?" He whispered, looking at his little brother.  
"Is he dead?" Jack mumbled, staring into space.  
"Yeah he is, I'm so sorry Jack"  
"It's fine, not your fault is it?" Jack said as he stood up from the sofa.  
"Jack-"  
"I'm fine Con, just a bit shocked. Don't worry about me" Jack said cheerily, but his smile didn't quite reach his eyes.  
Jack acted like this all week. He acted as normal, but he was trying too hard. He wouldn't discuss his feelings or the topic and instead chose to carry on with normal life. Conor was worried for Jacks mental health. It wasn't good for him to keep this bottled up, he needed to talk it out. He even accompanied Jack to the funeral, assuming he would need a shoulder to cry on, but no. Jack didn't flinch. He didn't shed a tear during the funeral or afterwards. He smiled politely to people and showed no emotion whatsoever. Conor didn't understand why he wasn't breaking down. However, jack would, soon enough.  
The two brothers were at home, not really doing a lot, just chilling out. Conor decided to jump up and grab a couple of beers. He brought them back through and handed one to Jack. Jack thanked him but then just stared at the bottle. Before he knew what was happening, Jack had burst into tears. Conor reacted and quickly pulled Jack into a crushing hug. He whispered soft sounds in his ear, trying his best to comfort Jack. Jack shook as he sobbed, gasping every few seconds.  
"Shh shh, it's ok Jack, it's ok"  
"No it-it's n-not!" Jack cried, sobbing into Conor's shoulder.  
"It will be, just let it out"  
"He's gone Con! And he's not coming back"  
"I know but you'll be fine. I know it's hard but you will be able to cope"  
About 20 minutes later, Jack had calmed down a bit and was just sniffling gently now.  
"The bottle" he mumbled, out of nowhere.  
"Huh?" Conor replied, confused.  
"It was his favourite beer"  
"Oh" Conor understood now, but chose to listen.  
"He always drank it, never anything else. I promised him last time I saw him that I'd meet him again soon and have a drink. We never did. I never got chance to say goodbye or anything" he whispered.  
"I know buddy, but you'll be fine. You're strong yeah?"  
"How do I do it Conor?"  
"You grieve. You cry. You scream. You get it all out then start to recover. You'll never forget him Jack, you'll just learn to adapt without him. He'll always be here" Conor said, tapping Jacks heart at the end.  
"Thank you" Jack mumbled into Conor's neck, pulling him in for a hug once more.  
"It's alright Jack, I'm here" Conor said as he ran his fingers through his baby brothers hair. All it had taken was a simple reminder for Jack to finally get it out, but Conor knew it was healthy. Now he could help his little brother get back to how he used to be.


	12. Catch It (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack has arachnophobia (fear of spiders)

Jack had always been terrified of spiders. Not in the normal 'I don't want to touch it' way, Jack would honestly have a panic attack if one came too close. Although Jack had got better at it as he could now manage to be in the same room as a tiny one without screaming, he was still too scared. Luckily, there was always someone around to take care of it.  
Jack was sat in his room just messing about on his phone when he saw some movement in the corner of his eyes. He flicked his eyes over but saw nothing. He just assumed it was a shadow or something. Then he saw it again, this time his eyes catching the object. It was a huge black spider. Jack froze. As soon as the spider started moving again, Jack screamed.  
"Help! Please! Help!"  
Conor, having heard his little brother screaming, sprinted through into his room.  
"What what?! What's wrong jack?"  
"Sp-spider!" He gasped, pointing at the creature.  
"Oh thank god, I thought you were in trouble or something"  
"I am!" Jack squeaked, inching further up the bed and away from the spider.  
"Where is it?" Conor sighed, watching Jack crawl away.  
"Over there. Please get it Con. Please" Jack mumbled, lifting his knees to his chest.  
"Ok ok, I see it. Now, come on then, that's it" Conor said as he picked up the spider in his hand.  
"Kill it!" Jack shouted.  
"Jack, there's no need to kill-"  
"Please! Kill it Conor"  
"Jack, it'll be outside"  
"No. Kill it. Conor please" Jack whispered, a tear threatening to spill out of his eye.  
Seeing the look on his face, Conor agreed and squashed the spider with his foot.  
"There. It's dead"  
Jack let out a small sigh of relief, but his body was still tense.  
"It's fine now Jack, it's gone" Conor said softly, noticing how scared Jack really was.  
"Sorry" he mumbled, head on his knees.  
"For what?"  
"Being such a wimp"  
"Don't be silly, you're afraid of spiders. So what?"  
"It's weird" Jack whimpered, looking genuinely sad.  
"Aw come on Jack. It's not that bad. It doesn't matter if you're scared" Conor said smiling.  
"Ok" Jack smiled back.  
Conor reached out towards Jack as his little brother walked into his arms for a hug. He held Jack, rubbing his arms up and down his back.  
"Con?"  
"Mmm?"  
"Please will you kill all the spiders"  
"If you want me to"  
"I do"  
"Fine then. I'll kill the spiders for you" Conor chuckled, thinking about his new job as chief spider catcher.


	13. I Don’t Care (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack tells Conor he is gay

Jack had had his suspicions for a while. Whenever a pretty girl would pass by him, he would immediately switch into flirt mode and usually take her home that night. However, recently he hadn't been getting those feelings anymore. Not for girls anyway. He found himself flicking his eyes towards men rather than women. At first he put it down to just finding the man attractive and appreciating that yeah, he's good looking. But then it started developing and jack realised that he didn't like girls anymore. He liked boys.  
This scared Jack. So so much. He didn't know what he was meant to do. A couple of his friends were gay, but all their families had rejected them. He couldn't lose his family. He wouldn't. So Jack just tried to ignore his feelings and stopped going out as much. He didn't bring anyone home at night and if he did decide to go out, he would return alone.  
The rest of the boys noticed something odd going on with Jack. Despite the fact that he had stopped bringing people home, he didn't go out as much. He used to be the life of the party, but now it was hard to even get him to leave the house sometimes. All 5 of his friends noticed something and decided to question Conor to see if he knew anything. He didn't. Jack wouldn't speak to him either. But Conor knew his brother wasn't himself and he set out to find the cause of the problem.  
Later that day, Jack and Conor were home alone as the rest had gone out. Conor knocked on his little brothers door and waited for Jacks reply.  
"Yeah?"  
"Can I come in?" Conor asked.  
"Sure" he replied.  
Conor stepped into Jacks room to see him sat against the headboard, his knees brought up to his chest.  
"You ok bro?"  
"Hmmm yeah, why?"  
"Its just, you've been acting strange for a few weeks now. And I'm worried. Well we all are"  
"I'm fine" Jack said, far too quickly.  
"You clearly aren't Jack" Conor said gently.  
"It doesn't matter" Jack mumbled, "It's nothing"  
"Please tell me"  
"It's not important Conor"  
"I want to know Jack. It's clearly upsetting you"  
"You'll leave me when I tell you" Jack mumbled, tears forming in his eyes.  
"What do you mean I'll leave you? Why would I leave?" Conor asked confused.  
"I think-no. I know I'm- I'm gay" Jack finally finished.  
"Yeah, and?" Conor asked, staring at Jack.  
"Why-why aren't you shouting at me?" Jack whispered as a tear fell from his eye.  
"Shouting? You thought I would be mad?" Conor asked, surprised at Jacks worry.  
"Well yeah"  
"Why would I care? Jack it doesn't change who you are"  
"But I like guys. And everyone else's family rejected them" Jack said, looking terrified.  
"Come on Jack, look at our family. We've never been like any others have we? I mean me, you and Anna, we're so close. We would never, I mean never judge you on how you feel Jack? If you like guys, great. What difference does it make? I'm going to love you regardless, and so will Anna, mum, dad and all our friends. No one will judge you for who you like Jack ok?"  
"Thank you" Jack whispered, tears streaming down his face because of the acceptance from his brother.  
"Shh shh" Conor soothed as he wrapped his arms around his baby brother.  
Jack sobbed into Conor's shoulder, releasing his tears and emotions, finally feeling happy for the first time in a while.  
"I'll always love you, whatever you do, you know that Jack?" Conor said softly as he ran his fingers through Jacks hair.  
"Yeah, I'll love you too, regardless"  
"Good. Now, stop with the tears because everything's ok. How about we go downstairs and put a film on?"  
"Sounds good to me" Jack said, a smile forming across his face. Jack finally understood that maybe, just maybe, everything would be ok.


	14. Don’t Blame Yourself (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack sees somebody commit suicide and it hits hims hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suicide is a triggering subject. If you are sensitive to the subject then please be wary when reading. I have not experienced this myself, but my friend has and told me how she felt when she was in Jacks situation. I understand the subject is extremely upsetting and so please be careful when reading. If you ever feel the urge to consider suicide, please talk to somebody. It doesn’t have to be family, it can be a friend, a teacher, somebody online or a helpline. Just talk to somebody please. And if you feel like somebody else is struggling, then please talk to them, support them and let them know they are not alone because you never know what difference one act of kindness can make to somebody’s life x

Conor was sat in his managers office, discussing some things about his new music. They were deep in conversation when the receptionist knocked on the door.  
"Come in" his manager said.  
"Excuse me sir, but there's a boy here, he says he's Conor's brother?"  
"Jack? Whys he here?" Conor asked confused.  
"I'm not sure, but he looks rather distressed"  
"I need to go" Conor said to his manager, jumping up.  
"But we haven't-"  
"I'm sorry, but my brother needs me"  
"Ok fine, be back tomorrow"  
"Thanks Aaron"  
"Now go" the older man said, pointing towards the door.  
Conor nodded and walked out the door quickly.  
He was met with the sight of his little brother sat on a chair, fidgeting and cracking his knuckles nervously. Jack looked up and Conor noticed the tears that had built up in his eyes.  
"Jack, what's wrong?" He asked softly.  
"I d-didn't know where to go" Jack mumbled.  
"Hey hey, it's ok. I'm glad you came here. Just tell me what's wrong" he said gently as he sat besides Jack. Luckily, everyone had left the room to give them some privacy.  
"It's my fault, it's all my fault" Jack repeated over and over to himself, pulling on his hair.  
"Jack, jack!" Conor said, trying to snap him out of his trance.  
Jack just looked at Conor and burst into tears. Conor pulled his little brother into his arms and rubbed his back.  
"Jack you've got to tell me what happened. I can't help you otherwise"  
"I'm s-sorry" Jack hiccuped, his voice muffled by his older brothers shoulder.  
"Don't apologise, just tell me what's wrong"  
"A boy he-he jumped off the bridge and I couldn't stop him" jack cried out.  
"Oh my god" Conor whispered.  
"He- he killed himself. And I just stood there! He's dead. No. I killed him" Jack gasped, his breathing increasing.  
"No, no look at me. Calm down. It wasn't you"  
"It was! He's dead because of me" the youngest sobbed, clutching onto Conor's shirt as he hyperventilated  
"Jack, stop. Now. Breathe"  
Eventually, Conor managed to get Jack to breathe normally and to calm down.  
"What have I done" Jack mumbled.  
"It's not your fault" Conor said quietly, Jacks head resting on his shoulder.  
"I should have stopped him"  
"No. He would have done it regardless. You couldn't have stopped it Jack"  
"I get to go home. I get to see you again. I get to see my family, my friends. I get to live my life. His is gone. His family will never see him again. His friends will never see him again. What if he had kids? He might have had a husband or wife? He might have had sisters or brothers, parents. They'll never see him again"  
"It was his choice Jack"  
"But I could have talked him out of it"  
"That wasn't your job to do. Don't blame yourself bro"  
"Everyone else will"  
"No one will, I promise"  
"I'll blame me"  
"Maybe. But you shouldn't. But I'll be here to make sure you get better"  
"Thanks Con"  
"Don't thank me Jack. Now let's get home and put a film on, your choice"  
"I thought you had work? Sorry I interrupted"  
"Don't be, you're more important"  
Jack smiled back as Conor jumped up and held out his arm. Jack grabbed his hand and felt himself be pulled up. Conor wrapped his arms around Jack, pulling him close.  
"I'll never blame you" he mumbled into Jacks hair.  
"Never?"  
"Never"  
Later that evening, the two brothers were curled up on the sofa, Jack snuggled into Conor's side.  
"Con?"  
"Hmm?"  
"I'm scared"  
"I'm here, I'll look after you buddy"  
"But I keep seeing it. Every time I close my eyes. Every time I think. I see his face. Watch him jump. Hear him-"  
"Look at me" Conor said, turning to face Jack.  
"Conor I-"  
"Just look at me and listen. I can't begin to understand what you're going through and I wish that you didn't have to witness that, but you did. And it's ok to be scared and upset and even angry. It's fine to feel something jack. But you're alive so you've got to focus on yourself. I understand you feel guilty and think that you could have prevented it, but you couldn't have. So I need you to try and move on. Don't forget, just carry on. Don't live in the past. You've had a tough day, but we'll get through it. I'll get you through it, yeah?"  
Jack nodded, nestling further into his brother. No more words were said. They weren't needed because jack finally understood. He realised that it wasn't his fault and he wasn't to blame. Thanks to Conor, Jack would survive.


	15. Still Breathing (Joe)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joe nearly drowns at a water park

The 7 boys decided that they needed a break. All of them had been busy and working hard for the past few months. They managed to find a date where they were all free and decided to go to a water park. All of them were excited as it was a chance for them to relax and forget about the work and stuff for a bit.  
The boys walked up to the entrance, all jumping about and laughing. They went to the poolside and set their stuff down. Each one jumped into the pool, causing a huge splash. They messed about for hours, just enjoying themselves. But they didn't know that soon that would all change.  
Joe didn't know what happened. One minute he was just stood in the water, relaxing for a bit and the next someone crashed into him. They took him by surprise and joe didn't have time to take a breath before he was submerged under the water. He flailed about underneath but couldn't find his way to the top. He tried to scream but it only allowed more water into his lungs. He could see his vision turning black and he eventually gave into the darkness.  
Luckily for Joe, Oli had seen everything that happened.  
"Joe!" He called out from the other side of the pool, quickly swimming towards his friend. He caught the attention of the other lads and all 5 of them quickly joined Oli in the race to get to Joe. Caspar managed to get their first and he dove under, coming up a few seconds later with the smaller man in his arms. He hauled him to the side and lifted him up to Josh who had already got out. The rest of the friends jumped out of the water too and surrounded joe.  
"Buddy?"  
"Joe?"  
"Can you hear me?"  
"Joe? Joe you ok?"  
Jack tapped his cheek to try and wake him up, but it didn't work. He remained unconscious. Conor quickly gripped Joes wrist, feeling for a pulse.  
"Oh my god he's stopped breathing! Quick! Call an ambulance!" Conor shouted, gaining the attention of the surrounding people.  
"Someone help him!" Mikey cried out, looking towards the crowds surrounding him.  
"I can help, I've got my first aid training" a youngish man called out, pushing towards the front.  
"Please help!" Caspar called out desperately, still clutching joes hand.  
The man gave CPR, 30 compressions and breaths. Eventually joe spluttered, coughing up water. He was rolled over onto his side as he brought up all the water he inhaled. Oli rubbed his back, trying to bring some comfort to the boy.  
"Thank god you're ok!" Josh said, relieved.  
Joe coughed again, gripping his chest.  
"Thanks lads" he mumbled, still coughing occasionally.  
"It's good to have you back buddy" Oli said gently, smiling at Joe.  
"Thank you so so much, you saved my life" joe said as he looked up to the stranger.  
"Oh really, its nothing, I'm glad you're ok" the man replied.  
"What can I give you?"  
"Oh nothing mate, just get better"  
"Thank you! Thank you again" the rest of the boys added.  
Luckily joe made a full recovery and was sent home from the hospital after a quick checkup. It's safe to say that the rest of his friends fussed over for him a while and he couldn't blame them if they checked he was still breathing every once in a while.


	16. In Your Shadow (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack is feeling inferior to Conor and causes him to turn to self harm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a triggering subject. Please be careful when reading if you know you are sensitive to the topic. If you are feeling the need to self harm, please talk to somebody whether it’s a family member, a friend, a teacher, somebody online or a helpline. You are not alone and there is a way out that does not involve harming yourself x

Considering Conor was the older sibling, it was natural for Jack to look up to him. And he did. He always had. But he also felt inferior to him. Conor was so much better at everything than him. He was a better singer, people thought he was funnier, he got more girls, he was more intelligent, he was better looking. Although these weren't all true, that was how Jack felt. He was so used to being compared to Conor that he just assumed he wasn't good enough.  
So Jack turned to hurting himself. Every time he cute his wrist, with each flick of the knife, Jack thought he was punishing himself.  
'One for not being good enough'  
'Two for being a disappointment'  
'Three for being a waste of space'  
This went on for a long time and no one even noticed. No one realised how much Jack was hurting from the inside.  
Jack and Conor were home one day, just watching some films and messing about.  
"Hey jack, can you pass me the remote?" Conor called out.  
"Urgh fine, you're so lazy" Jack muttered under his breath.  
"You're just closer" Conor laughed.  
Jack reached out to grab the remote, not realising that the sleeves on his shirt had ridden up. Conor gasped as he saw the red marks.  
"Jack"  
"Yeah?"  
"What are those?" Conor whispered, pointing at his wrists.  
"Huh? Oh n-nothing" Jack said quickly, yanking down his sleeves.  
But Conor had already seen. He reached out his hand quickly and grabbed Jacks wrist. Jack hissed at the contact, wincing in pain slightly.  
"Conor just leave it I-"  
"Jack what have you done?" Conor said in disbelief as he pulled up Jacks sleeve to reveal loads of scars, some new, some old.  
"It's nothing, just fell over and stuff"  
"Don't lie Jack. How long?"  
"Conor-"  
"How long?"  
"A few months"  
"Why Jack? Why?"  
"Im always in your shadow"  
"What?" Conor replied, confused.  
"I'm not good enough. You're the singer, the funny one, the clever one. Then there's me. I'm stupid and useless" Jack said softly, tears falling down his cheeks.  
"Jack stop this nonsense. You're perfect bro, don't believe all that stuff! Why would you compare yourself to me? We're different people and you're special in so many ways! There's plenty of stuff that you're better at and stuff I wish I could do like you. Never feel like you're worthless or I'm better than you because I'm not. Neither of us is better than the other and we never will be because we're brothers and no one will ever try to persuade me differently. I love you for who you are, not for anything you can do. Don't change or believe that stuff for anyone ok Jack?"  
"But-"  
"No buts. That's it"  
"I understand" Jack mumbles, wiping his eyes.  
"I'm sorry I didn't see that you were hurting, but I'm here now. And we'll get you better. You'll never have to be in my shadow ever again"  
"What if I get like this again?"  
"You won't. But if you do, you come to me. You tell me and I'll fix it. I don't care what time, what day or where I am. You call me and I'll come, ok?"  
"Ok"  
"To start off with, I want you to give me the razor"  
"No I can't I-"  
"Please Jack, for me. Give it to me and I'll help make you better"  
Jack nodded slightly, pushing himself up and walking to his room. He emerged a minute later with a small box in his hand.  
"That's the only one"  
"You promise?"  
"I promise"  
"Good boy. I'm proud of you Jack. I really am"  
"Even though I messed up?"  
"You didn't mess up, you just went down the wrong path. But you're back now, and I'm never leaving you again"  
"Thank you" Jack whispered leaning forwards into Conor. Conor opened arms and wrapped his arms around his baby brother. He held him, knowing that Jack was back, and he would never let him go again.


	17. In Your Shadow (Alternative Reaction)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alternative version to In Your Shadow. Jack has a slightly different reaction to Conor finding out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As stated in the previous chapter, this is a very sensitive topic. It may be triggering to some readers so please read with caution. Please reach out to somebody, anybody, if you feel depressed or just in need of some support. You are not alone and things will get better x

Considering Conor was the older sibling, it was natural for Jack to look up to him. And he did. He always had. But he also felt inferior to him. Conor was so much better at everything than him. He was a better singer, people thought he was funnier, he got more girls, he was more intelligent, he was better looking. Although these weren't all true, that was how Jack felt. He was so used to being compared to Conor that he just assumed he wasn't good enough.

So Jack turned to hurting himself. Every time he cute his wrist, with each flick of the knife, Jack thought he was punishing himself.  
‘One for not being good enough’  
‘Two for being a disappointment’  
‘Three for being a waste of space’  
This went on for a long time and no one even noticed. No one realised how much Jack was hurting from the inside. 

Conor came home one day and heard some sniffling. He followed the noise to Jacks room and barged in, wanting to know what was wrong with his brother. He wasn't prepared for what he saw. Conor saw Jack slitting his wrists.

“Jack?” Conor whispered, shocked.  
“Go away” Jack cried, watching the blood trickle down his arm.  
“Jack what the hell are you doing?!”  
“Go away!” Jack shouted back.  
“Give me the knife”  
“No! Leave me alone!” Jack screamed, crying harder and harder.  
Conor saw his opportunity and leapt forward and grabbed the knife. He threw it to the other side of the room and held Jack down.  
“Please” Jack whimpered, his face showing the pain he was feeling.  
Conor felt his heart shatter. His baby brother was so broken and he didn't even notice. He just wrapped his arms around Jack and held him close. Jack sobbed into Conor’s chest, shaking violently. Conor whispered soothing words in his ear, and just held him.

Soon after his breakdown, Jack relaxed slightly.  
“I'm sorry” he whispered.  
“Why? That's what I want to know” Conor said, lifting Jacks chin so he would look at him.  
“Im always in your shadow”  
“What?”  
“I'm not good enough. You're the singer, the funny one, the clever one. Then there's me. I'm stupid and useless”  
“Jack stop this nonsense. You're perfect bro, don’t believe all that stuff! Why would you compare yourself to me? We're different people and you're special in so many ways! There's plenty of stuff that you're better at and stuff I wish I could do like you. Never feel like you're worthless or I'm better than you because I'm not. Neither of us is better than the other and we never will be because we're brothers and no one will ever try to persuade me differently. I love you for who you are, not for anything you can do. Don't change or believe that stuff for anyone ok Jack?”  
“I understand” Jack mumbles, wiping his eyes.  
“I'm sorry I didn't see that you were hurting, but I'm here now. And we'll get you better. You'll never have to be in my shadow ever again”


	18. Turn To Twitter (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack gets into an argument and gets upset

Everyone gets in arguments sometimes, it's just what happens. And Jack wasn't new to confrontation, but he rarely argued with his friends. He hasn't ever really gotten into the whole drama and liked to just sort things out as quickly as possible. That's why jack didn't take it well when he and his friends had a fight. The worst thing, it was online in a group chat.  
AR – So, who's up for drinks tonight??  
TH – Sounds good to me!  
HJ – When and where??  
SW – How about 8 at Kings?  
JM – Sorry lads, busy tonight :(  
AR – Ah mate  
TH – Tomorrow?  
JM – Nope, can't do then either, I'm booked  
SW – You free any days next week Jack??  
JM – I don't think so, sorry boys, my schedules packed :(  
AR – Always too fucking busy now aren't you?  
SW – Yeah mate, do you even like us anymore?  
JM – Of course I do! I'm just busy!  
TH – The Jack I knew would always make time for his mates  
AR – Bet you think you're too good for us now don't you, because you're a YouTube star?  
JM – Wtf? Where is this coming from?  
TH – Just fuck off Jack if you don't want to be friends with us  
JM – No! I do! I'm just too busy!  
AR – Quit making excuses Jack, we're done with you  
*AR removed you from the group*  
Jack slammed his hands down in anger. They were being so pathetic! All of this beef because Jack had already made plans? Well screw them. He didn't need them. Jack vented his anger in his usual way. Twitter.

@jack_maynard23  
Always the same people ruining my day. Finally realised who my real friends are and who is fake. Glad to have got rid of you :)  
Only minutes after tweeting, Jack got a call from Conor.  
"Hello?"  
"Jack, you ok?"  
"I guess, why?"  
"Saw your tweet. What's up bro?"  
"It's nothing"  
"Mate you tweeted it, it's pretty serious"  
"Conor it's just pathetic"  
"I don't care, tell me anyway"  
So Jack told Conor the whole story. Angry was an understatement. Conor was fuming. How could his brothers so called 'friends' turn on him just because he was busy? Who did they think they were. Jack wouldn't tell Conor the names of the people, and Conor suspected it was because Jack knew that he would probably go punch them. So Conor turned to the internet to solve his problems. He tweeted it.

@conormaynard  
Some people need to grow the fuck up. Who do you think you are treating @jack_maynard23 like that? You pathetic little boys better watch out because you mess with my little brother, you mess with me


	19. I Don’t Feel Too Good (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack gets carsick

Jack wasn't a fan of long journeys. Not only were they boring, he also got sick. Quite a few times. It was only cars, Jack was absolutely fine on planes, trains and boats, but but him in a car for more than 2 hours then he was in for a rough time.  
Conor had a gig somewhere up in Manchester. Jack of course wanted to go as he loved being backstage at Conor's shows. However, when he realised how long the journey would be, he felt his spirits drop.  
"Yo Jack, you ready bro?"  
"Yeah, one second" Jack called back. He was currently in the bathroom, splashing cold water on his face. He felt sick already. He knew it was only psychological but he really didn't want to throw up in the car. He took some carrier bags, a towel and a spare shirt, just incase.  
Now Conor knew about Jacks carsickness and was reluctant to take Jack with him.  
"Jack, why don't you get the train up? I can meet you there"  
"No it's fine. I'll be fine, I feel fine!" Jack said cheerfully.  
"If you're sure" Conor said, not feeling 100% confident.  
About 2 hours into the journey, Jack started to feel a tiny bit sick. He took a sip of water and closed his eyes, begging himself to be fine. He lasted another 10 minutes before he realised he was going to throw up. He started rustling about, trying to grab one of the carrier bags.  
"Jack? Jack you ok?"  
"I don't think so" Jack mumbled back, trying to focus on breathing.  
"Oh god, do you feel sick? Shit, I'll pull over. There's a space over there" Conor said quickly as he pulled up to the side of the road. Luckily it was a country road, so hardly anyone was driving past.  
"Con, I don't feel too good" Jack said, opening the bag.  
"It's alright Jack"  
Suddenly, jack felt his stomach flip and he hunched over the barrier bag and threw up. Conor rubbed his back as he heaved. Once he had finished Jack jumped out of the car sat outside. He wiped the tears from his eyes as Conor sat besides him.  
"Here, have a drink" He said as he passed Jack a bottle of water.  
"Cheers" Jack said weakly, taking a sip from the bottle.  
"Sorry I ruined the trip" Jack mumbled, looking at his feet.  
"You didn't ruin it jack? It's not your fault you get carsick?"  
"No but it's silly"  
"No it isn't, besides I've seen you throw up hundreds of times, it's nothing new"  
"Cheers" Jack said softly as he rested his head on his older brothers shoulder.  
"No problem. Anyway, you ready to head off or do you need a few more minutes?"  
"No I'm good to go, how much longer left?"  
"Only about an hour, you'll be fine"  
"Yeah, I guess so"  
Conor held out his hand and yanked Jack up. The two of them returned to the car and continued their journey. By the evening, Jack had forgotten all about the journey, until he realised he would have to repeat the same thing to get home.


	20. Car Crash (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Conor are involved in a car crash

Jack and Conor were on their way home from Brighton. Both of them had spent the weekend at their parents and were in a good mood. They were singing along songs on the radio and having a laugh. But, that would soon change.  
Out of nowhere, a car came speeding towards the brothers. Jack cried out,  
"Conor! The car!" And Conor managed to swerve. Unfortunately, Conor directed the car right into a hedge, causing a minor accident.  
Luckily for the eldest, he wasn't injured, apart from a slightly bruised shoulder where the seatbelt had dug into his skin. He opened his eyes and assessed himself for damage. He couldn't see any, so breathed out a sigh of relief. However, he quickly turned to face Jack when he heard a slight whimper of pain.  
"Oh my god, Jack? Jack! Are you ok?" Conor panicked, undoing his seatbelt and leaning over to Jack.  
"My-my leg, it hurts" Jack stuttered, clutching his thigh. Conor noticed how the leg area of the car had caved in and Jacks leg was trapped.  
"Shit" he mumbled under his breath, realising his baby brother was hurt.  
"What? What! What's wrong!" Jack asked, panicking at the reaction of his brother.  
"Nothing. You're fine, calm down Jack. You're fine, I'm fine. Just breathe"  
"But my leg. It's broken and we're trapped and we might not get out and-"  
"Shh shh, bro relax. Breathe in with me. In and out, in and out" Conor coached, holding Jacks hand.  
Conor managed to get Jacks breathing back to normal and he jumped out of the car and ran around to the other side. He opened the door and knelt besides Jack.  
"Listen Jack, I'm going to try and move you ok"  
"Ok"  
"If it hurts too much, you let me know and I'll stop"  
"Ok, let's just get it over with" Jack mumbled.  
"Three, two, one" Conor counted as he pulled Jack out of the car. Jack cried out in pain, clutching his leg, but Conor had managed to get him out of the car so that was one good thing.  
"Good boy, I'm going to call for the ambulance now yeah?" Conor soothed as he put Jack down on the floor, sitting on the side of the road on the grass. Conor quickly pulled out his phone and dialled 911.  
"Hello, what's your emergency"  
"We've been in a car crash. My brother, he's hurt" Conor rushed out, keeping an eye on Jack.  
"Ok sir, calm down. Please can I take your name"  
"My names Conor Maynard, his is Jack"  
"Ok Mr Maynard, what's the exact problem with your brother?"  
"He's broken his leg, it got caught in the car"  
"Ok and where are you?"  
Conor listed the road name and was told they would be there as soon as possible. Conor sat with Jack until they arrived, and managed to persuade the paramedics to let him ride in the ambulance with jack.  
Jack was allowed out of hospital the next day. They wanted to keep them both in overnight just to check there were no other injuries. Jack had broken his leg and was in a cast for 5 weeks. He didn't adapt well. He couldn't adjust to not being able to move as easily and needing help for simple tasks. Conor and his friends fussed over him constantly, and though jack knew they meant well, it was getting slightly annoying.  
"Urgh!" Jack cried, slamming his hand down on the table. Conor came rushing through, looking panicked.  
"What's up? You ok? What's wrong?"  
"I can't do anything because of my stupid leg! I can't hold anything because of my crutches and it's just stressful!" Jack shouted, sitting down heavily on the seat in the room.  
"I know you're annoyed, but that's what I'm here for"  
"But I hate relying on you or other people. It makes me feel useless" Jack muttered.  
"You're not useless. Helping you is the least I can do, especially since it's my fault" Conor said softly, looking down at his feet guiltily.  
"Wait, it's not your fault Con. That car was coming at us, if you didn't swerve then who knows how bad we would be"  
"But you got hurt"  
"Not badly"  
"You broke your leg"  
"Yeah but I'm making a bigger deal than necessary just because I'm pissed off at myself" Jack laughed, trying to cheer Conor up.  
Conor cracked a smile and some guilt seemed to leave him.  
"Now, how about we go watch a film and I can put this bloody boot thing up?" Jack asked.  
"Sounds good to me, I'll get the popcorn"


	21. One Million (Jack)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack hits one million subscribers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s a short one, just to congratulate Mr Maynard on finally getting one million! So so proud of him, I've been a fan since day one! I still remember when he had about 10,000 subscribers, and was known as Conor's little brother, now he's hit a million and has made a name for himself!! Here's to Jack and I hope you are as proud of yourself as we all are!!

999,999 the computer read. Jack was sat anxiously at his computer, waiting for the numbers to change. It seemed like hours, when in fact it had only been minutes, when it finally changed.  
1,000,000.  
Jack had done it.  
"Oh my god!" He shouted out, bringing Conor in from the next room.  
"What? What?"  
"I hit a million!"  
"Well done bro! Knew you could do it!" Conor laughed, watching the genuine shock and happiness on his brothers face.  
"I can't believe it"  
"You deserve it Jack!" Conor said as he grinned and pulled Jack in for a hug.  
"I can't even register it"  
"Well Jack, you've almost got as many as me now" Conor joked, punching Jack in the shoulder.  
"Shut up" Jack replied, grinning at his older brother.  
The rest of the gang came round and they had a party to celebrate Jacks success.  
"Well done buddy!" Josh called out.  
"Cor yeah well done mate" Mikey added.  
"You deserve it Randy" Joe joked, smiling at the younger man.  
"Been waiting for this day for ages haven't you" Oli said, wrapping his arm around Jacks shoulder.  
"Thanks boys, I still can't believe it"  
The whole room "ahhed" touched at Jacks genuine shock and delight.  
"Well you know what's next don't you Jack?" Josh asked.  
"Huh?" He replied confused.  
"My 1 million" Josh laughed as the rest of the group joined in.  
"And me!" Mikey and Alex called out.  
"Anyway, let's raise a toast to Mr Jack Maynard, well done on one million, and here's to the next!"


	22. Hole In The Wall (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Conor fight and Jack punches a wall

"Just because you're older-"  
"Oh not this again, for gods sake jack! I'm only 2 years older than you!"  
"Yep and you seem to lord it over me in situations"  
"Oh like when?"  
"You just assume that because you're older, you should get the best stuff and the most praise and urgh!"  
"Can you hear yourself Jack?" Sounds like someone's getting a little bit jealous" Conor smirked, knowing it would wind Jack up.  
"Oh grow up Conor" Jack spat back.  
"Me? I'm not the one throwing a tantrum like a toddler"  
"Why the fuck do you do everything in your power to wind me up!"  
"I don't Jack! Just you being paranoid"  
"It's really not, you're pathetic"  
The argument went forwards and backwards, insults being hurled at each other. They could have gone on for hours, if Conor hadn't made Jack snap.  
"Always were jealous of me weren't you" Conor said, staring at Jack.  
Jack saw red. He screamed out in anger and before he knew it, brought his hand above his head and made a fist. His hand collided with the wall and a loud crash echoed through the apartment.  
Jack pulled out his hand, shaking from the adrenaline. Conor gasped, realising what Jack had done.  
"Shit, Jack"  
"I'm sorry" Jack whispered, cradling his hand to his chest.  
"How bad is it?" Conor asked, rushing forwards to stand next to Jack. He touched his hand, pulling back quickly when Jack hissed in pain.  
"Let's get some ice on that" Conor said as he guided Jack through to the kitchen. He sat Jack down and then walked to the freezer to grab some ice. He wrapped the ice up in a towel and brought it over to where jack was sat.  
"Here, put this on it, it should help"  
"Thanks" Jack mumbled.  
"How much does it hurt?"  
"A lot" Jack laughed gently, looking up at Conor.  
"Why'd you do it?"  
"Better the wall than you or anyone else"  
"But you hurt yourself?"  
"I'd rather hurt myself than you" Jack said quietly.  
"Aw Jack, I'm sorry for winding you up and for what I said. I didn't mean it"  
"I'm sorry for snapping"  
"Let's forget about it, hey?"  
"Sounds like a plan" Jack smiled.  
"Oh and one more thing Jack"  
"Hmm?"  
"You're telling Josh why there's a hole in his wall"


	23. Hidden Talent - Part 2 (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of Hidden Talent, so please go and read part 1 first if you haven’t already

Conors new single was done. It hasn't been published yet as he wanted a few people to hear it first. He took a copy home to his parents to listen to and one for his friends too. He got positive responses from his family and Conor was getting even more excited for it to be released.  
Part of the deal between Conor and his younger brother was that in return for Conors silence regarding Jacks voice, jack would sing backup on his new track. Jack didn't want to, but saw no harm in it because no one would ever find out it was him. He didn't want credit and for anyone to find out because singing was Conors thing.  
The elder Maynard took the final edit back to his flat and invited everyone round. He asked Mikey, josh, joe, Caspar and Oli round to meet him and jack for a surprise. None of the boys had any idea of what was going to happen.  
"Hey man"  
"Sugg!" Conor replied, grinning as he saw his friend at the door.  
"Casp and Oli are behind, just grabbing something from the car"  
"Ok, I know Mikey and Josh are their way too"  
Twenty minutes later, all 7 boys were sat in Conors living room, sat on the couch.  
"So, what's the surprise then?" Mikey asked.  
"Ok, so, I've been working on a new single and I have the final edit here"  
"That's so cool man!" Caspar called out.  
"That's not all, I want you all to be in the music video!"  
"Cor, that's wicked Conor!" Mikey cried.  
"Sooo, you want to be in it?" Conor asked.  
"Duh!" They all cried out.  
Conor laughed at his friends, relived at their reactions.  
"So you wanna hear the song?"  
"Yeah!"  
"Ok I'll put it on"  
The song played for the full 3 minutes and all 7 boys sat in silence, listening hard.  
"That was amazing!"  
"I think we've found a new single to hit the charts!"  
"I think we found a new number one!" Josh said, smiling at Conor.  
"Really?" Conor asked hopefully.  
"Yeah buddy! That was incredible!" Oli replied, smacking Conor on the back.  
"cheers guys"  
"Hey Conor, I've got a question"  
"Yeah joe?"  
"Who's that backup singer on your track? I mean it's a new one. Never heard their voice before but they're really really good!"  
"I'm not allowed to say, they want to remain anonymous"  
"Do you know what Conor, I think that person would be ok with you telling them who it is"  
"You sure?" Conor asked, looking at Jack who took in a deep breath and nodded his head.  
"Ok. Well lads, not only did you listen to one Maynard singing my new single, you listen to two of them!"  
"Huh?"  
"It's Jack"  
The 5 boys burst out laughing at Conors words.  
"Jack! Jack! But he can't sing!" Josh laughed, not believing Conor.  
"No, it's me" Jack mumbled, looking at his friends. They all stopped and stared.  
"Are you serious?" Joe asked.  
"Yup"  
"But you can't sing?"  
"I pretended"  
"Why?"  
"Didn't want to sing really"  
"You're not pranking us?"  
"Nope"  
"Sing us a verse Jack, just to prove it"  
"I-I don't want to" Jack whispered nervously.  
"Please" Mikey begged.  
"F-fine"  
Jack stuttered his words a little due to nerves, but he managed to get a verse out before he shuffled backwards and towards Conor for reassurance.  
"That was amazing"  
"I can't believe you can sing!"  
"Well done buddy! That was so good!" Oli said, rubbing Jacks arm in a comforting gesture.  
"See, told you you're good" Conor smirked as he looked at Jack.  
"Shut up" Jack joked, as he punched Conor in the arm. Maybe having this new talent wasn't so bad after all.


	24. Always My First Choice (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack feels like second choice to Conor

Conor and Jack had always been close. Maybe it was due to the small age gap, or maybe just because they got on so well. But either way, there was no denying that where one of them was, it was likely that other one would be there too. However, recently, Jack had been feeling a bit neglected by Conor. The elder Maynard hadn't made much time to speak to Jack recently.  
Now Jack wasn't one to be too dependable on one person, but Conor was his brother and this had left him feeling like second best. Conor seemed to spend every spare moment he had with the rest of the group and didn't make the effort to see Jack as much. Although they lived in the same flat, Conor spent more time with visitors than he did his flat mate and brother. This had been going on for quite a while now so Jack came to the conclusion that Conor didn't want him around. So, what did he do? Ran away.  
That night, he sat in his room, and scrawled out a note.  
"Dear Con,  
I know I've been a pain recently and I'm sorry that that's how you feel about me. Don't worry, I'm making your life easier and leaving. I won't be in your way any longer. I didn't mean to be a bother to you.  
Jack x"  
He left it on the table in the room, knowing Conor would see it in the morning. He shoved some clothes into a bag and grabbed as much as he could. He took his wallet and phone and as he walked out, left his key next to the note. He took one last look at the flat before walking out. Jack didn't have a clue where he was going and ended up wandering aimlessly for hours. He eventually sat down on a bench and ended up falling asleep.  
The next morning, Conor got up around 11, and walked out of his room. He looked around the flat, but no one seemed to be up. He decided to ask Jack if he wanted to go out for breakfast as he hadn't seen as much of his little brother as he'd hoped recently. He knocked on Jacks door and waited for an answer. There was no reply. Conor frowned and pushed open his door. Jacks bed was empty and hadn't been slept in. As Conor looked around, most of Jacks clothes were gone and the room seemed empty somehow. Something was nagging at the back of Conor's brain and he walked into the lounge area, confused. His eyes landed on a piece of paper on the table and he picked it up. He gasped as he read the note, thoughts of his brother hurt rushing into his mind. Conor quickly grabbed his coat and rushed out the flat. He wandered about, keeping his eyes open for signs of Jack. He rung all his and Jacks friends, asking them to keep an eye out for him and to ring him back if they found Jack. Conor was beyond worried now and on the verge of having a panic attack. Where in the world was his brother? Then it came to him.  
"Please please please work" he mumbled to himself, opening the find your friends app on his phone. Him and Jack both had each other in their list and could find out where eachother were. Conor prayed that Jacks was turned on so it would give him a clue as to where he was. It pinged and came up with a location. Conor breathed out a sigh of relief and rushed to get to the place where Jack was.  
Conor walked into the park and looked around for his brother. He saw a figure hunched over on a bench and he sprinted over, hoping it was him. He was delighted when he saw the face of his younger brother and he cried out in happiness.  
"Jack! Thank God I found you! I've been searching for hours!"  
"Why are you here?" Jack mumbled, hugging himself tightly. It was only then that Conor registered the state that he was in. Jacks hair was tousled and looked like fingers had ran through it a lot. His face was stained with tear tacks, he had dark circles under his eyes and he was shivering violently. All in all, Jack was a wreck.  
"I came here to bring you home, why else?" Conor said confused.  
"But y-you didn't want to speak to me"  
"Oh Jack, how could you think that?"  
"Because you never spoke to me! You spoke to our friends more than me and I felt like the second choice" Jack said, tears trickling down his cheeks.  
"Jack I'm so so sorry you felt that way. It's not true, none of it! I had no idea that's how you were feeling. I can't believe I made you feel like that"  
"It's not your fault"  
"But it is. How could I not even notice that my baby brother was hurting so bad that he ran away. I abandoned you" Conor whispered, tears coming to his eyes.  
"I probably overreacted, I just didn't want to be a burden"  
"You could never, EVER be a burden to me Jack. Never. You could never be my second choice either, always my first. I would always choose you over anyone, and don't ever doubt that for a second, ok?"  
"Ok" Jack whispered.  
"Now, will you please come home? I want my brother back"  
Jack smiled and nodded at Conor. The elder brother leant in for a hug and held Jack tight.  
"I'll never let you go again"  
"I know, I'm sorry"  
"Me too"  
The two brothers walked back home, glad they had sorted out their issues.  
"By the way"  
"Yeah?"  
"How did you find me?"  
"You left your location on" was the reply, as both of them burst into laughter.


	25. Always Close By (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Conor were bullied, which is why they are so close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bullying is a sensitive topic and some readers may get triggered by this. Please read with caution. If you or somebody else is getting bullied, please tell somebody. Tell a trusted adult, whether that be a family member, a teachers or a helpline. Don’t deal with this alone x

Even though they only shared a small part of their lives, anyone could see that Jack and Conor were close. Whether it was the fact they lived together or that they were always around eachother or even that they were constantly laughing and joking around. No one knew the real reason behind it, just assuming that they enjoyed each others company. The reality was comfort for both brothers.

As kids, they hadn't had it that easy at school. Although both boys were kind and intelligent, they weren't that popular among the other kids. They tended to hang around with eachother if possible. Because of the small age gap, they were more like best friends and loved spending time with the other. Conor usually got a rough time from some of the kids in his class because of his singing. They thought he was 'a faggot' and 'a wuss' because he sung. The words were cruel but Conor tried to ignore them and get on with his life and not let it affect him. But eventually, the bullies got bored and decided to take things to the next level.

Everyone knew about Conors soft spot for jack and they used this to their advantage. One day, Conor was dragged outside by one of the boys in his year to see his brother on the ground. Another boy was kicking him and another punching him. Conor tried to get to Jack but he was held back by a much taller and stronger boy. It was useless. Conor had to stand there and watch his baby brother get beat up. It seemed like hours before they stopped. They laughed and spat on the ground where jack was curled up. The leader of the group marched up to Conor and got in his face  
"Watch out pretty boy, it might be you next. Luckily for you, little baby Jack here happened to get in our way, so we're sorting him out. I guess it's a bonus that we're hurting you too"

He laughed as he walked off leaving the two brothers behind. Conor ran up to where jack was and knelt besides him.  
"Jack? Jack! Are you ok?"  
"No no leave me alone, please" jack mumbled as he curled in on himself even more  
“Hey it's me, it's Conor"  
“Con?" Jack whispered, looking up.  
"I'm so sorry Jack, this is all my fault"  
"N-no it's not"  
“Are you ok?"  
"Hurts" he managed to get out.  
"Come on, let's sort you out" Conor said as he helped his brother to his feet and walked him home.

This went on for months and months until finally someone realised what was happening. Conor was sick of seeing Jack getting bullied and beat up but he couldn't tell anyone, afraid of what they would do to jack. A teacher caught on when she saw the boys gathered around Jack on the floor and she sorted it out. They never bothered the Maynard again.

Although it happened years ago, the two of them never quite got over it. Jack hated being away from Conor, still slightly afraid that something bad would happen. The same went for Conor. So to try and make things better, Conor tried to bring back the smile on Jacks face. The one he loved when jack laughed and was truly happy. The two never left each others sides, a double act. In videos, Conor would do impressions to bring the smile on Jacks face. He would always sit next to him, ensuring that at least one body part was touching to ensure he could keep an eye on the younger one. It became routine, and the two of them didn't want it any other way. It was as Conor had said, the first time Jack was beat up,  
“Don't worry Jack, I'll always be close by"


	26. Insecure (Joe + Caspar)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caspar is insecure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, this may be triggering for some readers. Just know that every single one of you is beautiful inside and out and no matter how you see yourself, there are people who love you regardless of how you look or act, or any other insecurities that bother you. Nobody is perfect and one day, you will find the people who love you because of your insecurities and love every single part of you x

Joe and Caspar were best friends. It was as simple as that. Despite them not living together, it didn't make the two any less close than they were. They were always pranking each other and constantly laughing. It was familiar, and it was good. It was a stable relationship that the two enjoyed and relied on. So, when Caspar started distancing himself from Joe, the older man was concerned.

It started off with delaying text replies. Then ignoring calls. Then occasionally cancelling arrangements and not going out anymore. Eventually it got to the stage where if Joe wanted to see Caspar, he had to meet him with other people to ensure Caspar couldn't cancel. Joe had tried to get his friend to talk to him, but it was useless. Caspar was drifting away and there was nothing Joe could do to stop him.

One day, Joe thought enough was enough after Caspar cancelled on him once again. He stormed to Caspars flat and walked in using the spare key he still had. He didn't know what he was going to say, but he had to figure out why Caspar didn't want to talk to him anymore. However, when Joe walked into Caspars room, he didn't expect to see what he did.

Caspar was stood in nothing but his boxers, red marks and bruises covering his body. He was crying to himself as he looked in the mirror. Caspar jumped when he noticed Joe stood at the door and quickly grabbed a shirt and threw it on.  
"J-Joe? What you doing here?"  
"I came to see why you were ignoring me"  
"I'm not ignoring you"  
"Caspar that's rubbish and you know it"  
"Joe I-"  
"Would you care to explain why you are crying in your room with bruises covering you body?" Joe asked, arms folded across his chest, concerned for his friend.  
"It's nothing"  
"It's not nothing Casp, is someone hurting you? Because I can make them stop"  
"No! It's, it's my boyfriend ok. Sometimes he gets angry and he takes it out on me. But I broke up with him so it's fine"  
"Caspar I have known you for too long to not know when you're lying. Tell me the truth"  
"It is!"  
"No it isn't. And I know you don't have a boyfriend, because despite what you may believe, I know you would have told me"  
"Fine, it was me" Caspar mumbled softly, tears still falling slowly down his face.  
"What do you mean it was you?"  
"I did this to myself"  
"Oh Caspar, why?" Joe signed, walking towards his friend.  
"Because I hate myself sometimes ok! I'm insecure and I don't like the way I look. I didn't know what to do, so I thought maybe this would help, and it does a bit"  
"Why didn't you speak to me? You know I would have helped you"  
"Because look at you! You're perfect and look at me! I thought you'd be disgusted by me and hate me, so I distanced myself and hoped you would give up on being friends"  
"Caspar, how could you think that? One, there is NOTHING wrong with you at all. I promise. Two, I would never judge you on how you look and could never be disgusted with you. And three, hurting yourself is not the answer. You speak to people and they will all tell you there is nothing wrong. Don't compare yourself to others because you're a different person. I'm no better than anyone else and you're no worse. So let me in Casp, let me help you"  
Caspar nodded in reply, before the tears fell down his face as sobs shook his body. Joe pulled him into a hug, holding onto his best friend, knowing he needed his support. The two stayed like this until Caspar pulled away slightly.  
“Joe?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Thank you"  
"Always, no problem"


	27. Don’t Overdo It (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack faints

Life as a YouTube was hard. The pressures of creating good content, keeping up to the fans demands and dealing with meetings and opportunities was certainly draining. Despite this, they all still enjoyed it. However, in his concern for his career, Jack forgot to look after himself.

The whole buttercream gang was round Joes to film a new video. All 7 of the boys were having a laugh and were happy to finally be filming a video altogether. It was very rare that all of them could work out a time on their schedule when they were all free. Jack was looking forward to it and hadn't stopped talking about it to Conor.

Before filming, the 7 boys were sat on the couch, catching up with each other and just relaxing. Jack was sandwiched between Conor and Joe and although he tried to focus on what conversation was being held between his friends, he couldn't stay concentrated for more than a few seconds. His head was pounding and he was sweating for no apparent reason as it wasn't that warm. Conor seemed to noticed Jack was being slightly withdrawn and decided to take Jack out of the room and see if he was ok.  
"Hey Jack, you fancy helping me grab some drinks for us all?"  
"Huh?" Was his reply.  
"Drinks. Kitchen. Come on" Conor said, frowning at his little brother.  
"Hey are you ok mate?" Oli asked, the other boys now all staring at Jack.  
"Yeah yeah I'm fine, just a little warm"  
"You probably need some water"  
"No no I'm fine, I'll just go and get some fresh air" Jack mumbled as he stood up, gasping as the world started spinning.  
“Jack?" He heard someone say softly, the voice fading in and out between the ringing in his ears. Black spots danced across his vision and before he knew it, everything turned black.

Conor was concerned when he noticed Jack keeping to himself, the usually talkative boy hardly saying a word. He decided to speak to Jack alone, hoping to find the cause of the problem. However, as Jack stood up, Conor saw him start to sway.  
"Jack?" Josh called out, everyone staring at Jack.  
Jacks eyes rolled back and luckily Conor noticed and managed to rush forward and catch him before he hit the ground. He grabbed Jack under the arms and pulled his younger brother towards him, holding his unconscious form.  
"Shit!" Joe called out, as Conor lowered Jack to the floor.  
"What's wrong with him?" Mikey asked as they all surrounded him.  
"Hey hey, let's give him some space" Caspar added, moving back.  
"Do we need to call an ambulance?" Someone said, Conor not noticing who, instead focusing on Jack.  
"No, he's fine, he's coming to, see"  
Jack groaned, his eyes flickering, adjusting to the light.  
"Mghh? What happened?" He managed to stutter out, squinting his eyes as he sat up slowly.  
"Welcome back" Joe called out, smiling at him.  
"Back where? Where did I go?"  
"You passed out buddy" Oli added.  
"Oh"  
"Yeah oh, what the fuck is wrong with you man? I was so worried!" Conor said, glaring down at Jack. "I swear to god Jack Maynard, if this is down to you doing something stupid, I'm going to kill you myself"  
"Sorry Con, guess I just overworked a bit"  
"I don't think that's it" Josh said.  
"Huh?"  
"I think you're dehydrated. You have a headache, you're dizzy and I haven't seen you drink in ages"  
"Or eat for that matter" his elder brother added.  
"Shit. I forgot" Jack mumbled.  
"You can't just forgot to eat or drink Jack!" Conor shouted.  
"I'm sorry, I was just busy" Jack whispered.  
Conor sighed and pulled Jack up to stand.  
"Never mind, but you mister, are coming home with me, now"  
"But the video-"  
"Never mind the video, you need to go home and rest" Joe cut in.  
"Yes, listen to the old man" Mikey added, everyone laughing.  
"Come on" Conor said as he guided Jack towards the door. He took him home and made sure he drank and ate enough to ensure it didn't happen again.

"Con?" Jack asked as the two of the were sat on the sofa watching a film.  
"Hmm?"  
"I'm sorry I forgot to eat and drink"  
"It's ok buddy, just don't do it again. You don't understand how worried I was!"  
“I won't overdo it next time, I promise"


	28. I Missed You (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack misses Conor whilst he’s in LA

Jack hadn't seen his older brother for a few weeks now and it was slowly dawning on him how much he actually depended on Conor. Although it didn't seem like he was always with him, in his absence Jack noticed how frequently he spent time with Conor. Although his brother came back for a few days over the time he was in LA, jack missed having him around. Of course he would never admit it but he missed him.

It was finally time for the younger Maynard brother to go with his friends to LA. He would finally get to see Conor. He sat next to Mikey on the plane and the older man asked Jack if he was excited.  
"I bet you're well excited mate!"  
"Of course I am Mikey, we're going to LA"  
“I meant about seeing Conor but that too"  
"I guess I'll be happy to see him but it's not that big of a deal" jack shrugged, playing off how excited he really was. 

The plane landed and the first thing Jack did after walking into the airport was look around for Conor. He was meant to be meeting them off the plane to say hello to his mates. Jack looked around nervously, wondering where he was. Suddenly Abe shouted out "There he is!"  
Jack whipped his head around to where Abe was pointing and grinned when he saw his older brother walking towards them. Jack may or may not have walked quicker than usual to greet Conor and held his arms out for a hug. Conor pulled his little brother close and the two boys held on tightly.  
"Hey there little bro" Conor whispered.  
"Hey" Jack replied, his voice muffled by Conor's shoulder. Jack may have held on a little longer than necessary but eventually had to let go when he realised that the others would probably take the mick out of him and gloat in the fact that Jack did actually feel relieved to see Conor again, despite what he tried to make  them all believe. The rest of the group exchanged 'hellos' and 'how are you?'s before grabbing their luggage and going to the house that the boys had rented.

An hour later, Jack and Conor had already got ready and were sat in the lounge waiting for the rest of the group to get showered and dressed to go out for lunch. Jack was sat next to Conor on the sofa and the two were sat very close together. They were having a casual conversation about what had been going on in the past month or so and catching up on stuff they had missed.  
"So, you missed me then?" Conor asked, raising his eyebrows at Jack.  
"Nope, I'm glad to have got rid of you" jack replied, laughing at his older brothers face.  
"Well, the messages the boys have sent me beg to differ. Oh jack is so lonely and miserable. He really misses you. He's so excited to see you in LA" Conor smirked.  
"W-what n-no? That's not true!" Jack shouted, trying to defend himself.  
"Relax Jack, I missed you too" Conor chuckled, laughing at his brothers stubbornness.  
"Ok well maybe I missed you a little bit" jack mumbled, not looking up.  
"Just a little bit?"  
"Ok ok you got me. I missed you a lot" jack said rolling his eyes.  
"Aw my baby brother missed me!" Conor joked, nudging Jacks shoulder.  
"Noooooo don't lord this over me" jack whined.  
"Don't worry I won't because otherwise you'll hold this over my head" Conor said as he pulled Jack into a hug. Jack nuzzled his face into his big brothers neck and wrapped him arms around Conor's waist.  
"I missed you" Jack whispered softly.  
"I missed you too" Conor replied as the two sat in silence, just holding eachother, knowing this was where they belonged.


	29. The Reason Why (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacks girlfriend cheats on him

Jack had a reputation. He was a player. That's just who he was. He was loved by everyone because Jack didn't do it to hurt people's feelings, he just couldn't commit. Well that's what Jack led them all to believe anyway. Jack had a fear of commitment and the fear of rejection. He was scared that if he got too close, he would get hurt. So he kept his distance, hooking up for the night then forgetting them as quickly as they came. 

Jack had met someone. Not just a one night stand. He found someone who he actually liked. He asked her out, and she accepted. The two of them were good together. She made Jack happy. He was loyal and kind, and he treated her well. All the boys noticed a change in Jack, a positive one. He was always uplifted and had a certain positive energy around him. Conor was the happiest out of the group because his baby brother had finally settled down and was happy. That's all he wanted. 

Two months later, Jack had gone out to surprise his girlfriend with a date night, leaving Conor alone in the flat to get on with some work. Conor was working towards his new album and sometimes enjoyed the peace and quiet and the ability to work. Conor wasn't expecting Jack to be back for at least another few hours as it hadn't been long since he left. Which is why the older Maynard was so surprised when his brother returned home early, and went straight to his room. Jack didn't even say hello, which was very unusual for him. Conor was concerned so followed the boy to his room. He knocked on the closed door and spoke.  
"Jack? Jack are you ok?"  
"I'm fine"  
"You sure? Can I come in?"  
"I'd rather be alone. I'm fine. Just go away please" came the voice from inside the closed room. Conor walked away, intending to speak to Jack in the morning and find out what was wrong.

But Jack never came down the next morning. He didn't leave his room throughout the whole day, except from to go to the bathroom. Conor was very worried now, this wasn't like Jack. He kept knocking on the door, but Jack just ignored him. He tried again the next day. And the next.

Eventually, Conor knocked once more, but demanded to be let in.  
"Jack. Open the door. I haven't seen you in 5 days. You haven't eaten, you have hardly moved and it's not healthy for you. I want to know what's wrong and you're going to tell me. I don't care if it take all day"  
After Conor's speech, Jack slowly opened the door, revealing his tear stained cheeks and red puffy eyes.  
"Oh Jack" Conor sighed, stepping into his room.

Conor joined Jack on the bed, sitting besides him.  
"She cheated on me" was all Jack said. He said nothing else. But those four words spoke mountains because Conor was able to join up the dots.  
"I'm sorry Jack, she didn't deserve you" Conor said softly, opening his arms for Jack to hug him. Jack fell into his brother arms and wrapped his arms around Conor's neck. Once he realised he was safe, he broke down, and more tears were shed. He didn't stop. He sobbed and he shook, and Conor just held him right and stroked his hair, whispering soothing words into his ears, trying to calm him down. 

"What's really wrong though Jack. It's not just her cheating, there's something else bothering you. I can tell"  
"I-it's not important" Jack stuttered.  
Conor gave Jack a pointed glare and Jack started to explain himself.  
"I went to her flat to surprise her. I'd booked a table at her favourite restaurant and everything. It was for our two month anniversary. I don't think she even noticed. I got to her flat, and I had a spare key. So I let myself in, and well, I saw her. And another man. I asked her how long, she said about 3 weeks. Two months I dated her. I'm not even worth two months. This is why I never settled down before! This is the reason I never chose one girl! You open your heart, you get hurt. They fuck you over and you end up heartbroken" Jack cried.  
Conor had tears in his eyes too at the story of what his baby brother had gone through. He didn't deserve it. Jack was a good person who had been let down too many times. 

"Jack, she wasn't the right one for you. And she didn't deserve you if she was willing to cheat. You're not the problem, trust me. One day, you will find someone who will fall in love with you and want to spend their whole life with you. And you'll be happy. And it'll all be worth it. And yes, there'll be heartache and pain first, but it'll all be worth it in the end, I promise"  
Conor whispered all these words into his brothers ear, holding him tight. Jack nodded, sniffing and looked up at his big brother.  
"Thanks Con, really. I mean it"  
"No problem Jack, I love you man and I promised you it'll get better. As your big brother, I am entitled to look after you, no matter what"  
"I love you too" Jack replied, nestling his face into the crook of Conor's neck. The two brothers just laid on Jacks bed, Conor holding Jack, knowing that for now, there was light at the end of the darkness. There was still hope for happiness.


	30. I Don’t Belong (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack finds out he is adopted

Despite Jack and Conor looking absolutely nothing alike, they were the same in so many ways. Both natural jokers, both successes and both loved the other. The two brothers were closer than most and they intended to stay that way. 

For a video, Jack had asked his parents for boxes of his, Conor's and Anna's childhood things whilst he was visiting them with his brother. It was a rare opportunity that the three siblings were together at the same time. He wanted to find some funny photos, or artwork or stuff like that so the siblings could react to them. Jack decided to look through Anna's first. He laughed to himself as he found terrible drawings and cringey photos. Next was Conor's and jack couldn't stop laughing. He couldn't wait to show these to his brother. He found Conor's birth certificate and read it, then put it back in the box. Lastly, he opened his. He grinned as he saw pictures he remembered drawing, and stories he wrote when he was younger. He eventually reached the bottom of the box and frowned. Where was his birth certificate? He saw Anna's as he was sifting through and he had seen Conor's, but where was his. Confused, he decided to ask his parents. He assumed it was in another box. Little did he know, that wasn't the case.

Jack walked into the living room where both his parents were sat watching TV.  
"Hey sweetie" his mum said, smiling.  
"Hey mum, dad"  
"Did you find what you wanted in those boxes?" His dad asked.  
"Yeah yeah, well, actually no. I have a question. Where's my birth certificate?"  
"W-what?" His mother stuttered, quickly glancing at her husband.  
"Conor's and Anna's are in there, but mine isn't. Is it in another box somewhere?"  
"I think you better sit down Jack" his father said, his voice suddenly very serious.

 

Jack sat besides his parents on the couch, looking concerned.  
"What's wrong?"  
"Look Jack, we love you. You know that right?"  
"Of course mum, what's wrong? You're scaring me"  
"After Conor was born, we wanted another baby, so we tried for another. And we tried for a while, but it didn't work. We were told we couldn't have children and that Conor was an exception. He shouldn't have been made, but he was. And we're ever so grateful we were granted him, but we wanted another. So we, we looked into adoption"  
"No. No no no no no" Jack mumbled to himself.  
"Jack as soon as we saw a photo of you we fell in love. It felt right. You were meant to be with us" his mother said, reaching an arm across to touch Jack. He pulled back quickly and stood up. He stumbled back slightly until he hit a wall.  
"I- I'm adopted. You're not my parents" he stuttered.  
"No Jack. We are. You are our son and we love you so so much. We raised you and we love you no more, no less than Anna or Conor"  
"But I don't belong here. I'm not part of this family" he whispered, realisation hitting him.  
"Jack, Jack that's not true. I am your mother, you are my son. You belong here just as much as anyone else. Just because I didn't give birth to you, it doesn't make me any less of a mother"  
"I can't, I can't be here. I just can't" Jack said as he stormed out of the house. As he opened the front door he crashed into Conor, who stumbled back. Jack didn't stop. He ran down the road and out of sight.  
"Mum? Dad? What happened? What's wrong with Jack?" Conor asked, concerned for his little brother.  
"He just needs time" his dad said, both his parents sat on the couch. His father had his armed wrapped around his mother, comforting her.  
"What did you say to him?!"  
"Leave it Conor. Not now" his mum said.  
"No I won't leave it. Jack is upset and I want to know why. Fine. If you won't tell me, I'll ask him myself"  
"Conor no! Don't do it pl-"  
But it was too late. He was gone.

 

Conor walked down to the beach, he knew Jack would be there. He walked towards the rocks, the place where the two of them used to go when they were younger. He saw Jack staring out to the water, face showing pain. Conor sat beside him, and looked at him.  
"Hey" he said.  
"Hi" Jack replied.  
"What's wrong"  
"Nothing"  
"Come on bro, I'm not stupid"  
"Don't call me that. Just... don't" Jack said quietly, pain and sadness in his eyes.  
"Don't call me that? Don't call you what? What are you on about? Jack? Tell me" Conor asked, turning his body so he sat opposite him.  
"Im not your brother Conor"  
"I don't understand"  
"I'm ad-" Jack took a deep breath before he continued. "I'm adopted"  
Conor gasped. He couldn't believe it. His baby brother, well he, wasn't. Well he was, just not biologically.  
"Jack I-"  
"Don't. Don't say it. I can't bear it"  
"Don't say what?"  
"That you hate me. That you never want to speak to me"  
"What? Why? Why would I EVER say that Jack!"  
"Because I'm not your brother. I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere" Jack cried, tears slipping down his face.  
"First off, you are my brother. I don't care who says differently. Maybe not biologically, but you are as much my sibling as Anna is. I've known you since you were a baby. You've been my best friend since I was 3 and you were just a small, screaming kid. I don't care if we have different parents, because we don't really. Mum and dad, OUR mum and dad raised us both. And even if you don't belong to them biologically, you belong to them regardless. They love you. I love you. You belong here Jack, you belong with us"  
"Why didn't they want me" Jack sobbed, shoulders shaking.  
"Who?"  
"My actual mother and father"  
"I don't know Jack, but I do know one thing. It was their loss, not yours. They lost the best person in the world. They lost an amazing, talented, funny person in their lives and we gained one. You were meant to be with us Jack, you just were"  
"You won't treat me differently?" Jack whimpered.  
"No. I would never. As far as I'm concerned, you're as much my brother as you were 10 minutes ago. Maybe even more now"  
"Please don't leave. Like they did. Please just, don't"  
"I wouldn't. I couldn't. I promise. I love you Jack"  
"I love you too" he whispered back, wiping his tears.  
"Now, come on. Let's go back home. Mum and dad will want to see you. And I for one, am absolutely starving"  
Jack chuckled and took the hand Conor held out for him and was pulled up. The two brothers walked slowly back to the house, a comfortable silence passing between them. Words weren't necessary anymore. Jack knew that he belonged. And his family, his REAL family wanted him there and Jack, well Jack wanted to be there too.


	31. Deep Down (Jack + Conor)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like I had to write something about what happened to Jack. I don't want to rant or talk too much, but I think that Jack was treated unfairly. He tweeted some stupid things, 6 years ago. I am in no way justifying what he wrote because I know, and he knows, that it wasn't ok. I understand that the things he wrote were vile and I do NOT condone behaviour like that. Frankly I think it was disgusting. But people need to understand that people can change. I certainly have in 6 years and I truly believe Jack has. He is ashamed of what happened and he has apologised. I just wanted to write what I thought could have happened (obviously I know this didn't, but hey, it's fiction)

Conor tapped his feet anxiously, waiting for Jack to step off the plane. He had been waiting at the airport for over an hour and he really wanted to see his brother. Ever since all the stuff about Jack had got out, Conor had been worried sick. So when he heard Jack was flying back to the UK, he drove to the airport as quickly as possible. 

After a few more minutes he looked up and saw the unmistakable blond hair of his baby brother. He looked him in the eye, and when Jacks eyes met his brothers, he couldn't help but burst into tears. He ran up to Conor and threw himself into his brothers arms, whilst Conor held him tightly and rocked him forwards and back.  
"Hey hey, shhh, shh now" he soothed, running his hands through Jacks soft hair. He held his brother for a few more moments before pulling them both down to sit on some chairs. Jack didn't let go of Conor for one second. Once sat down, Conor turned to face Jack and tried to wipe the tears off his face.  
“I've really messed up haven't I" Jack hiccuped, tears still streaming down his face.  
"No no no, you haven't messed up, it's fine"  
"I've ruined my career and everything all because I tweeted something stupid 6 years ago"  
"Jack, look at me, it's not over. Yes you made a mistake, but you're human. Everyone understands. You have apologised and you are ashamed and I know that you would never say stuff like that now. Would you?"  
Jack just shook his head.  
"Exactly. Now, this will fade away eventually and everything will go back to normal'  
Jack mumbled something under his breath.  
"Hmm? What was that?" Conor asked, studying Jacks face.  
"Do you- do you hate me?" Jack whimpered, looking up at his big brother through his eyelashes.  
"Oh god no, how could you ever think that Jack?! I don't care what you said or did 6 years ago, what I care about is you. I love you for who you are and I would never hate you for something that's in the past. I love you so much, ok?"  
"I'm sorry I let you down"  
"You didn't Jack, you didn't"  
"Promise me you won't hate me when the comments come in?"  
“Never. I'll always love and protect you. And the press can do whatever they want, because I know what you're like deep down, and that's who I love"  
"But everyone hates me"  
"People don't hate you. A lot of people are furious and are siding with you. You have loyal fans and people who care about you. Never forget that. And you have your family and friends who would do anything for you. So don't for one minute think you've screwed anything up, because the important things in your life haven't changed"  
"Please make this all go away" Jack whispered into Conor's shirt, gripping it like a lifeline.  
"I'll try Jack, it'll all be ok"


	32. Relapse (Joe + Caspar)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joe used to deal with an eating disorder and had relapsed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a triggering subject. If you are sensitive to the topic then please beware when reading on. If you are suffering through this or know somebody who is, then please reach out to somebody you trust. It can be a family member, a friend, a teacher or somebody online. Just talk to somebody. There is nothing to be ashamed of and there are people who want to help you x

Everybody had their insecurities, and that's ok. But for Joe, his insecurities led to a serious issue. As a teenager, he had a nice figure and was average weight. But when he looked in the mirror, that wasn't what he saw. He saw an ugly chubby kid. So he decided to do something about it. He started off with cutting out snacks in between meals and started going to the gym. It worked. But it wasn't enough. So he cut out breakfast. Then lunch. Then dinner. He stopped eating completely. He spent his time exercising and trying to work on his figure. He became a shadow of his former self. He was pals and was practically skin and bone. But still he only saw a fat kid. And no one noticed. No one saw when he would stuff himself at dinners that he couldn't get out of, then creep off to the bathroom and throw it all up again. He enjoyed the power he had over his body and liked being in control. But one day it got too much. His body couldn't cope with the stress he was putting on his body. So it gave up. He collapsed at school one day and was rushed to the hospital. His parents cried when the doctor told them Joe had an eating disorder and his sister promised to always look after her little brother and she promised she would make him feel better again. And he did get better. He went to therapy and got a control over his habits. He never felt the need to stop eating again.

Joe decided not to tell any of his friends about his past because he didn't want their sympathy and pity. However, this mistake could have cost him his life. Since being a teenager, he had started a YouTube channel and become famous worldwide. He was making a difference to peoples lives and he loved it. But among the thousands of positive comments, there were always a few negatives. And the ones that commented on his weight sparked something inside of Joe. His brain told him that he needed to stop eating again. So he did. He relapsed back into his old habits and he felt victim to his mental illness once more. He thought nobody noticed. He was wrong. His roommate Caspar had seen how his best friend was always looking tired and worn out. His normally tanned skin had gotten pale and his fitted shirts now hung loosely off his frame. He tried to get through to Joe but he wouldn't listen. It got to a point where Caspar couldn't ignore it anymore. Him and Joe were in the kitchen when Joe stumbled. He said he was fine and he just had a dizzy spell. So they let it go. But minutes later, Joe collapsed to the ground. For Caspar, everything happened in slow motion. He could only watch as Joe fell to the floor. He quickly knelt besides his friend and when Joe didn't wake up, called the ambulance. They came and took Joe away and Caspar followed behind.

 

“Caspar?"  
"Z-Zoe"  
"What's up Casp?"  
“It's Joe. He-he passed out and he's at the hospital and I don't know what to do. Please help!"  
"Woah slow down. Text me the address of the hospital and I'll meet you there. I'm on my way"  
"Please hurry"  
"I will. And Caspar, don't worry you did a good job buddy"

Whilst Caspar waited for Zoe and for news about Joe, he decided to contact some of their friends and tell them what had happened. Oli and Will said they were on their way and would be there as fast as they could. Others like Jack and Conor apologised they couldn't be there and sent their love and asked to be kept updated. Caspar smiled to himself because they had good friends, and Caspar was scared and sharing the burden had helped him.

Zoe arrived at the hospital and spoke to Caspar for a while. The doctor came out and asked for Joes family. He told them that Joe had not been eating and it had been going on a while.  
"Not again" Zoe mumbled under her breath.  
“What?" Caspar replied, confused.  
Zoe explained everything to Caspar about Joe as a teenager and he felt his heart break at what his best friend had gone through. He vowed to help Joe as much as he could. As soon as they were allowed in to see Joe, the two friends went in. Tears were shed among all three of the group as they spoke about Joes situation. Zoe and Caspar promised to help Joe get better and Joe promised to ask for help and to confide in them about how he was feeling. Joe would get better because he had an amazing support system and this time, he wouldn't have to go through it alone.


	33. Broken Ankle (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conor breaks his ankle

Jack and Conor had decided to go out for a bit as both boys had been busy with work for a few weeks and hadn't had time to have a break. They decided to go hiking and walking through the forests because both boys loved being in nature. The fresh air and scenic view was enough to make them forget about their troubles and busy lives. 

They were walking through a particularly rough bit when Jack heard a scream from behind him. He quickly turned around to see his brother on the floor clutching his ankle. Jack fell to his knees next to Conor and quickly asked what was wrong.  
"Shit Con, what happened?!"  
"The tree root, ARGH" he grunted out, clearly in pain.  
"Let me have a look" Jack mumbled, prying Conors hands off his ankle.  
"Crap, I think it's broken" Jack said, glancing up at his brother, noticing him cringing in pain.  
"Fuck fuck fuck it hurts" Conor cried out, tears slipping down his face.  
"Hey hey, it's ok. I'm here, I'll get help don't worry" Jack said trying to comfort his brother.  
"D-don't leave"  
"I won't, I promise. Now just try and breathe through it ok whilst I ring the ambulance"  
Jack quickly dialled 999 as he held his brothers hand.  
"Hello what service do you require?"  
"Ambulance please"  
"Where to sir?" Jack tried to list off the name of the forest they were in and their rough whereabouts  
"Ok and what's your name please and the name of the person who needs assistance"  
"My name is Jack Maynard and my brother Conor has broken his ankle I think, he needs help"  
"Help is on the way, please try to stay calm"  
Jack hung up and returned his full attention to Conor.  
"Ok deep breaths Con. In and out. In and out. Well done"  
It wasn't long before both boys heard sirens in the distance.  
"See that Con, they'll help you in a few minutes"  
The ambulance drive was short and luckily Jack was able to ride in the back with Conor and give him words of comfort. As soon as they got to the hospital, Conor was wheeled away and Jack was left to fill in the details. 

A few hours later Jack was able to see Conor as the operation had gone well.  
"Hey bro" Jack said softly as he walked into Conors hospital room.  
"Hey Jack" Conor replied, smiling at his little brother.  
"How's your ankle?"  
"Broken"  
"Well even I could have told you that" Jack laughed, grinning at his brother.  
"I'll be sure to go to you next time I need medical assistance" Conor joker back.  
"So how long will this boot thing be on?"  
"About 6 weeks, maybe longer"  
"No more hiking for a while then you clumsy oaf"  
"Oi little brother, it could have easily been you"  
"No no no Con, only you could have fallen over a tree"  
"Hey! It was a big root"  
The two siblings joked about for another hour before the doctor came in to say he could be discharged. "Hey Jack" Conor said as they were getting ready to leave  
"Yeah?"  
"Thanks"  
"For what?"  
"For helping me today and for being a rock"  
"Hey you would have done the same for me"  
"I know but I really needed you and you did a good job buddy"  
"I love you Con"  
"Love you too Jack"  
The two Maynards hugged and pulled away. "Anyway, better get home because I'm dying to watch some tv"  
"Glad you got your priorities straight Conor"  
"As always, anyway, I've got something to look forward to"  
"And what would that be?"  
"You being my slave for the next month" Conor laugher, an evil smirk on his face.


	34. Battered And Bruised (Jack, Conor, Joe + Caspar)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack, Conor, Joe and Caspar get kidnapped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may be a triggering subject for some readers. Please be aware when reading and if you are extremely sensitive to this specific topic then please consider not reading it x

Not everyone liked youtubers. That was a fact. But no one ever suspected someone would take it this far. No one ever thought it would get deadly. 

Jack, Conor, Joe and Caspar were sitting in Jacks flat, just relaxing after a long week. The four friends had decided to put on a movie after filming videos and having dinner. It was calm and peaceful and a much needed break for the four friends.  
*Knock knock*  
Jack looked up from where he was sat and stood up.  
"Wonder who that is?"  
"Maybe it's a delivery or something?" Joe suggested.  
"Didn't order anything"  
"Well here's a good idea, go and answer the door and see" Conor said, smirking at his brother.  
"Jesus Con, don't get your knickers in a twist" Jack replied, enjoying the banter with his sibling. 

"Hello, what do you wan-" Jack was cut off by a punch to the face. He collapsed to the ground and clutched his head, moaning in pain.  
"Hey what's going on out here? Hey! HEY! What do you think you're doing?!" Conor shouted, having seen what was going on.  
"Conor, what the fu-" Joe said, him and Caspar turning the corner, only to stop in shock when they saw what was happening. Jack was on the floor, his head bleeding, Conor was being held against a big guys chest whilst another three men were stood at the door, pointing a gun directly at them.  
"Hello boys. I suggest you all follow me without making any fuss. One peep out of any of you, and this bullet goes straight through your head, you understand?"

Joe and Caspar quickly nodded their heads, panic rising in their chests. One man came and roughly grabbed the two boys by their arms, dragging them out the door, whilst the other one dragged Jack up from the floor by his shirt, pulling him up to stand.  
"Hey! Careful! He's hurt!" Conor shouted, trying to breakaway from the hold.  
"Shut it Mister, or this kid will be dead before you know it!"  
Conor shut his mouth, his concern for Jack outweighing his desire to scream at the psychopath.

The four boys were dragged towards a large white van and thrown into the back. Conor first, then Joe, then Caspar, then Jack. Jack was pushed to the floor of the van as the door slammed shut behind them. Conor quickly pulled his brother close to him, leaning Jack against his chest.  
"Hey buddy, are you ok?"  
"M'sorry I let them in" Jack mumbled, his eyes fluttering.  
"Don't be silly Jack, you had no idea what would happen" Caspar said kindly, trying to reassure the younger boy that they didn't blame him.  
"How's your head?" Joe asked, concern in his eyes.  
"Hurts, but I've had worse" Jack laughed, trying to lighten the situation.  
Conor didn't say anything, but just held Jack close and tried to give him any comfort he could. 

Before long, the van came to a halt and the doors were opened. The four boys were pulled out of the van and pushed towards a large, seemingly abandoned, warehouse in the middle of nowhere. Each man grabbed a boy and took them inside. Four chairs were set in a circle, facing inwards. Each youtuber was sat on a chair and tied up, ropes tight around their ankles and wrists.  
“What do you want?" Conor pleaded, scared for his and the others lives.  
"Ah ah ah, we make the demands here, not you. Now. I know that you four are very famous. And very influential. This means you're worth a lot of money. So we left a little note for the police, demanding a small sum of money for your safe return"  
"You're sick" Joe spat out, venom in his words.  
The four men laughed, evil in their eyes.  
"Not sick, just maybe... morally challenged?" The ringleader said, earning more laughs from the other men.  
“Remember boys, behave, and there's no need for you to get hurt more than necessary, but we'll have our fun first" The man said this slowly, walking around the circle.  
"How. About. We play. A game." He said, each word finished with a sharp enunciation.  
"I pick one of you and we perform a little show. Who is the weakest, who will cause the most pain? Ah ha, you!" He said pointing towards Jack.  
"Ah that one, that's his brother over there I think, he jumped to his defence very quickly" one of the men chimed in.  
"Oooh siblings! How exciting!"  
"You leave my brother alone" Conor spat, fighting his restraints.  
"This should be fun" he laughed, untying Jack from the ropes.

"Now we need another one. Which of you two?" He asked, directing the question at Joe and Caspar.  
"Me! Punish me, not him!" Joe said quickly, trying to save his best friend.  
"Brave. Well, in that case, we'll take him since he clearly means so much to you" he said, pointing to Caspar.  
“No! Leave him alone! Please!" Joe begged, tears threatening to spill.  
Caspar had yet to say anything, fear expressed on his face.  
"Sit back and relax boys, you're in for a rough ride!"

Jack and Caspar were taken from their chairs and brought to the middle of the room. They both tried to fight it, but two men held each boy. There was no chance of escape. The men circled them both, eyeing them up. Out of nowhere, two fists came and punched each boy. One for Jack. One for Caspar. The two boys fell back from the impact, clutching their bodies in pain.  
"JACK!"  
"CASPAR" Joe and Conor cried out at the same time.  
"STOP! YOU'RE HURTING THEM!" Joe screamed, tears streaming down his face.  
"My dear boy, that's the point. By hurting them, we hurt you. And by hurting you all, we win. Don't worry. We won't damage them too much, we promised we'd return you all alive"

Punch after punch after punch after punch. It didn't stop. Jack and Caspar were on the floor, moaning in agony, their bodies having been assaulted over and again. Words were shouted, "No one loves you!" "They'll never come for you" "You're useless!" The mental torture was potentially worse than the physical. But eventually it stopped, and the men ceased from the abuse.  
"I think that's enough for now. Boys, we'll leave you alone. Hope we didn't cause too much inconvenience!"  
Joe and Conor were untied as the men left. Both boys rushed towards the bodies on the floor, collapsing beside them both. 

"Jack! Jack! What have they done? Speak to me! JACK! PLEASE!" Conor sobbed, holding his brother close to his chest. Jack opened his eyes, and curled up into a foetal position, shielding himself.  
"No more. No more" he mumbled to himself.  
"It's me Conor. They've gone Jack. They can't hurt you now. It's ok"  
Jack opened his eyes and met his brother shining ones. Jack burst into tears, the pain and emotional torture too much for him. Conor just held him close, trying to protect Jack from any more assault.  
"I've got you. I've got you now. It's ok. Shhh" he muttered, hugging his little brother to his chest.  
"I'll protect you Jack, they won't hurt you again, I promise"

The same thing was going on a metre away. Joe was holding Caspars talk frame, which suddenly seemed so much smaller now. His blood covered hand was clutching Joes as tightly as possible, seeking any comfort he could find.  
"I'm sorry Casp, I'm sorry. It should have been me. I can't believe I let this happen" Joe cried, tears slipping down his face.  
"S'ok" Caspar slurred, his split lip preventing any proper words coming out.  
"It's not ok, it's not. But I'm going to make sure you're ok. I won't let them hurt you again" Joe swore, vowing to protect his best friend at all costs.

A few minutes later, Joe turned to Conor and met his teary eyes.  
"How's Jack?"  
"He's not good. He's got concussion and I'm pretty sure a few ribs are broken, I don't know what to do. How's Casp?"  
"Caspars not doing well either. His face is smashed in and I'm pretty sure they dislocated his shoulder and potentially broke his wrist"  
“I'm going to kill those bastards if it's the last thing I do" Conor seethed, anger coming out of his mouth.  
"I know you're angry Con, but Jack needs you now. You have to be strong for him and I have to be strong for Caspar. It's all we can do right now"  
"You're right" Conor took a deep breath.  
"But as soon as Jack is taken care of, nothing will stop me from killing those bastards. No one touches my baby brother and gets away with it"  
“Trust me Con, I'll be there with you, making sure those men get what they deserve"  
The four boys managed to find a reasonably comfortable position, Jack lying on Conor's lap, head against his chest and Caspar leaning against Joes shoulder, the smaller mans arm wrapped around his shoulder. 

That was how the police found them. They raided the building, breaking down the doors. Conor and Joe instantly shielded the two boys, ready to hurt anyone who came near them.  
"Back off, or I swear you'll regret it!" Conor shouted.  
"It's alright son, I'm officer Taylor of the police, we've come to save you"  
“Oh thank god!" Joe cried out, almost crying with joy.  
"Please help us! My brother and my friend are injured badly, they need a doctor now!"  
"Alright kid, alright. Calm down now. Your brother and friend will be fine, we'll take care of them."

Jack and Caspar were put on stretchers, to be taken away to hospital.  
"No! No!" Jack cried out, screaming when the paramedics came near.  
Conor ran towards Jack and grabbed his hand.  
"Hey hey buddy, it's ok. You're going to the hospital to get help. I'll see you there ok? You're safe now don't worry"  
"Don't leave me please" Jack cried, clearly traumatised by the event.  
"I'll be with you buddy, don't worry. You let them help you, I'm here"

It took a few minutes before Jack and Caspar were both happy to leave Joe and Conor. Caspar didn't want to leave without Joe, the past few days drama catching up with him. Both boys promised to see them at the hospital once they had spoken to the police.

After a few hours, the police were done with Conor and Joe and had gotten all the information they needed. The men were arrested, but not before Joe and Conor got a punch in.  
"You stay away from me and my family or I swear to God you'll regret it"  
"You ever come near my friend again, you'll be six feet under"  
The two boys were taken to the hospital to be reunited with their friends.

After both Caspar and Jack being released from the hospital with broken bones and strict instructions, everyone went back to Jacks flat. No one wanted to leave eachother, refusing to be alone. That night, no one slept. Despite being exhausted, the four boys knew they would only wake up screaming, nightmares preventing a good nights sleep. So they watched films. No one slept the next night either. Or the next. Every night Jack would snuggle into Conors chest, his big brothers arms keeping him safe. Caspar would lean against Joe, seeking protection from his best friend. There were no complaints. The two older boys were glad they could protect them and themselves from ever being hurt again.

To say it was hard to get over was an understatement. There were nights when Jack was plagued with nightmares. There were nights when Conor refused to sleep, incase someone broke in. There were days where Joe refused to leave the house, too scared of being taken again. There were days where Caspar couldn't move because of his injury's. It didn't get better. Until one day it did. Eventually, the memory faded a bit. Bit by bit, they fixed the broken memories until they could function on a daily basis without breaking down. And they felt better. And they looked better. And they carried on with their lives, knowing they had the support of the other three and the promise of a new day. Because they had survived.


	35. It Doesn’t Matter (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Conor get into a fight and Jack hits Conor

“God you're so annoying sometimes!" Jack shouted.  
"You think you have it tough? I have to deal with you 24/7" Conor replied.  
"You seriously think you're so much better than everyone else don't you just because you can sing?!" The youngest screamed.  
"Is THIS what it's about? You're jealous of me?"  
"Jealous? Why would I EVER be jealous of you? Jesus Conor you're such a prick sometimes!"  
"Oh you know what Jack, GROW UP! Maybe we can talk this out when you aren't throwing a tantrum like a stroppy toddler!"

This was enough for Jack to see red and he suddenly flipped. He shoved Conor into the wall and started kneeing him. Conor pushed back and they both ended up on the floor. Before anyone knew what was happening, Jack punched Conor in the face. It wasn't hard enough to really hurt, but the shock was enough for silence to fall upon the room. Conor looked up, wide eyed, only just registering what happened. Jack had gone pale, no colour in his face and his raised hand was shaking.  
"Jack?" Conor said, trying to break the silence.  
"I- I'm- I have to go" Jack whispered, voice breaking. Jack leapt up and sprinted out the house before Conor could stop him.  
"Shit" The eldest brother mumbled, scrambling up himself. 

Conor wasn't sure where Jack had gone, but he had a good idea. It was mid November and it was really cold outside, so Conor grabbed an extra coat for his little brother. Whenever Jack got stressed out or needed time alone, he always went to the park. Conor had found him there many times, the youngest often needing comforting. Conor walked to the bench and saw his little brother sat there, knees tucked up to his chest. He sat next to Jack and turned to face him.  
"You ok?"  
No reply.  
"Jack?"  
Still nothing.  
"Jack?"  
"I hit you" he whispered, so quietly, Conor only just heard.  
"I know, but it's alright, it was just a-"  
"No! I HIT you!" Jack said, louder this time.  
"Jack-"  
"What is ok about that? I hurt you. I NEVER wanted to hurt you. I know I was angry, but how could I physically hit you?"  
"It's fine Jack, it didn't hurt"  
"That's not the point Conor. I could have done. I get so angry sometimes and I just lose control. Imagine if I had hurt you. Imagine if it had been worse" he whispered, a tear slipping down his cheek.  
"I shouldn't have encouraged it. It's just as much my fault as it is yours"  
"But you didn't hit me. You would never hit me. And I hurt you"  
"It doesn't matter Jack! You're my little brother and I still love you! So what if you got a little too involved and lashed out, you didn't mean to. I know you would never do that on purpose so that's all that matters"  
"You're not cross?" Jack whimpered, wide eyes shining with tears. Conor's heart melted at the sight.  
"Never Jack, nothing you do will ever make me love you less, ok?"  
"Ok" he replied softly. Conor pulled Jack into a hug, and held his little brother. Conor noticed that Jack was shivering and pulled out the spare coat.  
“Here you are, wear this. You're shivering. Not very clever is it? Going out mid November with no coat on?" Conor said, chuckling slightly.  
"Thank you Con, I mean it"  
"Always, I'll always help you, yeah?"  
"Yeah. I promise I'll never hit you again. Ever. I love you"  
“I love you too Jack"

No fight was enough to break the bond of the Maynard brothers. Conor always had his brothers back, always.


	36. Damaged Goods (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please could you do one where Jack gets raped? If you don't want to I understand and hope it isn't hard for you to write?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you get triggered by the subject of rape, please don't read this, or if you are then please be aware of the potential consequences. I hope anyone reading this doesn't get upset with how I have portrayed it as I have tried my best. I have tried to do justice to the subject as best as I can and don't want to offend or upset anybody. I understand how serious this subject is and by absolutely no means agree with or condone this kind of behaviour. I just wanted to bring awareness to the issue. If you are suffering due to the aftermath of sexual assault, then I would first like to say how brave you are and how you are an inspiration to me. I saw my best friend suffer through it and it is a cruel cruel world we live in. Please talk to somebody, anybody. A friend, a family member, a teacher or somebody online. Just please don’t suffer alone x

Jack knew it wasn't a good idea. He knew he shouldn't have walked away from his drink and left it unguarded. He knew the first rule was to never leave your drink incase someone drugged it. But he did. And he would regret that choice for the rest of his life. 

Him and the boys were in the club, having a night out. Jack had had a few drinks, he wasn't drunk, just a little tipsy. And he was enjoying himself. Really enjoying himself. He had just bought another drink, but as he was about to take it, he saw his brother motioning him over. Jack left the bar and his drink to go and speak to Conor.  
"Jack, we're leaving in about half hour, make sure you're ready by then"  
"Sure thing" Jack replied before returning to the bar. He didn't notice the odd taste in his drink. He didn't notice the eyes watching him from the other side of the room. He didn't notice he was in danger.

Jack was starting to feel lightheaded and a bit dizzy, so he stumbled outside to get a bit of fresh air. As his knees gave out, he felt someone grab his arm and hold him up. He looked up to see a large man, who looked to be a few years older than him.  
"Careful there buddy, I think you've had a few too many"  
"I'm fine, just a lil diz-dizzy" Jack slurred.  
"Why don't you come over here and clear your head a little bit"  
"No no 'm ok, my friends are waiting for me"  
"It'll only take a minute. Come on, I'll look after you"  
The man dragged Jack round the corner and down an alley. He pushed Jack up against the wall and stroked his cheek. Jack flinched and turned his head away.  
"Please can I go, my friends will be looking for me"  
"Now now, let's not rush this. I've been waiting all night to have you all to myself"  
"W-what?"  
"That's right. And now I've got you. All to myself. And nothing is going to spoil it for me"  
"Help! Let me go!" Jack cried out, before the man slammed his hand over Jacks mouth to silence him. Jack struggled, but the man was stronger.  
"Good boy good boy, I know you want it" he hissed into Jacks ear, the boys eyes widening in fear at the reality of what was happening. 

Jack tears streamed down his face as the man yanked his trousers down and slammed him harder against the wall. Jack was crying, begging him to stop. But he wouldn't. He didn't. He did it. Jack cried out as it happened, wishing he could just die in that moment. He wondered what he had done to deserve this. Wondered why this happened to him. He eventually went slack. His body numb with pain, and he let it happen over and over again. 

The man left him, alone in the alley, clothes torn and trousers on the ground. Jack was curled up against the wall, staring at his wrists where bruises were starting to form. He couldn't move. He was in too much pain. He was in shock. He heard his phone ringing, but he didn't move to answer it. It rang again and Jack registered the ringtone. He reached his hand out and grabbed the phone from the floor. He answered without checking the ID.  
"Jack?" He heard his brother say.  
"Jack are you ok?" Jack couldn't reply.  
"Jack! What's wrong with you?"  
"Help" he managed to whisper.  
"Oh my god what's happened. Jack talk to me. Where are you? What happened?"  
"Corner. Drugged. Hurt" he mumbled, not really understanding what he was saying.  
"I'm coming Jack, hold on" Conor said, already walking out the club. Conor looked down all the alleys he could see until he saw a figure hunched against the wall down one of them. He spirited down it until he reached the body.

"Jack!" He shouted, collapsing beside his brother.  
"No! No! No! Get off!" Jack screamed, trying to move away.  
"Hey hey, it's me Conor. You're safe now, no one can hurt you"  
Jack looked up at Conor and saw his big brothers eyes looking at him in concern.  
"Con?"  
"Yeah it's me. I'm gonna help you ok buddy? I'm gonna make it better"  
"The man he-he" That was all Jack got out before he broke down crying. Tears streamed down his face as he gasped for breath. Conor grabbed his baby brother and pulled him onto his lap.  
"Shh shh, I got you. I'm here. You're safe" He soothed, stroking Jacks hair.  
"Don't let him hurt me. Please" Jack begged, mumbling into Conors shirt.  
"I promise I won't. I'm going to take you to a hospital so they can check you over ok"  
"No no no! No hospital! No more!" Jack screamed hysterically.  
"Jack jack, calm down. You need help. And something happened. You're hurt. You need a doctor"  
"You can't leave me. You can't let him get me"  
"I'll never let him get you. Just let me take care of you" Conor said, pulling Jack up to stand. It was then that Conor noticed the absence of clothing on Jacks lower half and he gasped. It all made sense. Conor linked it all together and shed a tear when he realised what had happened to his baby brother. Jacks knees gave out, as he stood and fell into his brother. Conor held him against him as he grabbed his phone and dialed 999.

The ride to the hospital was agonising. Jack held onto Conors hand like it was a lifeline. As soon as someone tried to ask Conor to leave, Jack screamed and threw a fit. The doctors had ended up sedating him to make sure Jack didn't harm himself. As Jack was wheeled into the room, Conor was held back, and left to talk to a doctor. He was told to fill in the forms and wait for news about his sibling. The wait was torture for Conor. For hours he sat there, waiting for news about Jack, not knowing what was going on. Eventually a doctor came out and told Conor that he could go in to see him. They filled him on Jacks condition, but Conor already knew. He already knew what that man did to his brother.

Conor gasped as he walked in Jacks room. His brother looked so small, so innocent. The wires seemed to cover his whole body and he was as pale as the white sheet beneath him. He walked over and sat besides him. He grabbed his hand and spoke to him softly.  
"Hey buddy"  
"Hi" He rasped out.  
"How you doing?"  
"Hurts. Tired"  
"I know. You'll be better soon though"  
"I won't"  
"Huh?"  
"I can't get him out my head. Every time I close my eyes he's there" Jack whimpered, tears falling from his eye.  
"Hey hey, shhh. We'll get you help. We'll help you get better"  
"Please don't leave" he whispered, clutching Conors hand.  
"I won't leave. Not now. Not ever"  
"Promise?"  
"I promise. Now get some rest buddy, it'll all be ok soon"

And Conor kept his promise. He never left Jacks side until he was ready to come home. He comforted Jack when he had nightmares. Dragged him out of flashbacks. Held him when he was down and talked him out of his negative thoughts. He did his best, and it worked. Jack was getting better, slowly but surely. And one day, maybe he would be able to trust everybody again. And maybe it wouldn't hurt so much when he was reminded of what happened. Regardless, Conor was going to stand by his brother and make sure he never got hurt again.


	37. A Bit Too Friendly (Jack + Conor)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conor gets mad when somebody hits on Jack

It was a commonly known fact that Conor was overprotective of Jack. He couldn't help it. It was in his nature. Nobody touched his baby brother without Conor's permission or god forbid someone ever hurt Jack, that person would probably be sore for quite a while. 

The whole group of boys were spending the evening together. They were watching movies, playing Fifa and just having a general catchup. It was getting late and all the boys had probably had a few too many drinks. Not enough to be out of control, just enough that they were slightly tipsy. All the boys had left to go help out in the kitchen except for Jack and Joe. They were just having a normal conversation about filming and new video ideas, when Joe decided to change the topic.  
“So Jack, any new girls recently?"  
“Nah mate, this guy is too good for the ladies to handle"  
“Well I wouldn't disagree" Joe said, looking Jack up and down.  
“Well, I am said to be the good looking one" Jack joked, laughing.  
"You look good tonight Jack, I don't know if anyone has told you" joe smirked, moving closer to Jack.  
"Um thanks dude, but I think you may have had a few too many beers" Jack laughed, slightly uncomfortable. It wasn't that he thought Joe was unattractive, it was just the situation was getting a bit too serious for Jack to handle.  
"What, a guy can't say his mates good looking?" Joe whispered as he nudged closer to Jack.  
"Not when it's my baby brother you can't!" Conor said angrily as he entered the room.  
"Huh Con? Wait-" Joe said, panicking as Conor stormed towards him.

Conor yanked Joe up and stood face to face with him, anger radiating off him in waves.  
"Who the FUCK do you think you are, coming on to him? That's my baby brother Joe!" Conor shouted.  
Jack immediately jumped out of his seat and tried to talk Conor down.  
"Con, Conor! Leave it! He was just messing about" Jack said as he tried to grab Conor's arm.  
"I don't give a shit whether he was declaring his love for you or just messing around! He was hitting on you Jack!" He said, shrugging off his brothers arm.  
"Conor, Conor stop. We've all had too much to drink" Joe replied.  
"Don't tell me what to do, you piece of shit!" Conor shouted.

By now, all the boys had gathered in the room after hearing the commotion.  
"Woah woah what's going on?" Josh asked, looking confused.  
"This dickhead thought it would be a good idea to hit on Jack!"  
"It was a joke! Chill the fuck out Conor!" Joe said, seriously concerned for his safety.  
"That's it!"  
Before anyone knew what was happening, Conor had tackled joe to the ground and was wrestling him in an attempt to pin him down. Conor raised his fist to punch, when Jack grabbed Conor from behind and pulled him back. Mikey and Caspar pulled Joe up from the ground and shoved him behind them. Conor tried to resist and struggled, lashing out at whoever was grabbing him.  
“Hey hey Con, it's me, it's Jack, calm down" Jack whispered.  
Conor instantly relaxed, not wanting to hurt his brother. Jack pulled Conor up and lead him out of the room.

"Conor you have got to calm down!" Jack said once they were alone.  
"But he was-"  
"Look I know, but you can't go around hitting people! Especially our friends!"  
"He is not my friend right now"  
"What's the big deal Con? I don't get it, nobody else does"  
"You're my baby brother dude! I know you're an adult or whatever, but you're still my little brother. I hate that I can't protect you anymore. If you get hurt I feel guilty and it hurts me too. And when I saw Joe, someone who I'm supposed to trust flirting with you, it just turned a switch in me or something. I just couldn't stand the idea of him hurting you in any way and me having to know that I played a part in that. I don't know, it just made me mad"

The whole time Jack was sat silently. He knew Conor cared, of course he did. He loved his brother to death and would do anything for him, and he knew it was the same for Conor. But Jack had no idea just how much Conor cared.  
"Wow, I- I didn't know. I'm so sorry. I get why it's a big deal. But Joe wasn't being serious, we've all had too much to drink and it was harmless. I think you need to apologise"  
"Fine, I'll say sorry. But if he so much as tries it on you again I'll-"  
"Ok Con, I think he understands" Jack laughed, pulling his big brother into a hug.  
"Now come on you big softie" Jack smiled as the two Maynards walked back into the room.

When Conor walked back in, all the boys seemed to tense up, afraid that he would lash out again.  
“Relax guys, my psycho phase has passed"  
"Look Conor I'm so-" Joe stuttered.  
"Please, let me. I'm sorry for lashing out at you and for saying what I did. I just saw red when someone tried to hit on Jack. It would have been the same for anyone probably. I'm too protective, it's my own fault"  
"No I'm sorry. I understand. I'd be the exact same if any of you tried it on with Zoe. And she's my older sister, so it must be even worse for you when it's your little brother"  
"Truce?"  
"Forget it ever happened"  
The two boys hugged it out and the evening returned to normal.  
"But seriously guys, don't ever go near Jack again, of I will literally kill you"

And somehow, everybody knew that Conor Maynard was being deadly serious.


End file.
